Am I successful?

We often reach a stage in life when we ask this question “Am I successful?” to ourselves and there are likely a few possible responses like yes, no, maybe etc. During many of my interactions, I have asked a set of people what success meant to them. Many said it was directly proportional to their position in the hierarchy and the salary, some said it was about how happy and content they were, while another group said it was about the attention that people around showered upon them. I thought to myself that all of them were quite valid only because it was specific to that person. So the variable here was not really the reason per se but the thought process of the person. Let us take a step back and ask why this question about success would come up in the first place? I can relate back to a piece of data pubIished by Gallup which says that most people tend to be ‘Achievers’ which is simple terms is the need for attainment . We may often think that some people are blessed enough and don’t really need to earn a living or do anything for that matter. Well, the fact is most of these people may go on for a few months or a few years without doing anything till they realize that they are just whiling away their life. Many of them even get into finer arts or music or maybe even a sport and want to excel in it because sooner or later this question comes back again and again and it could be very haunting indeed.

I feel that the earlier we realize about this ,the better it is because this would bring about a clarity of mind which would then lead us to create our path or think about our goals . Treading on this path or meeting our goals would lead to such a great deal of satisfaction and would make life seem worthwhile. I have often seen many people who reach a certain stage in life and realize that they had been going with the flow and never thought about where they were headed. I was recently talking to my cousin who is in his early thirties and he seemed a bit disoriented; when I asked what was wrong, he said that he could not do anything in life. I can understand how frustrating this thought could be. Many times we compare ourselves or get compared to others and end up undermining our own achievements. As simple as it may seem, I had heard a very wise person say “Our life is ours and their life is theirs. In all probability we would not even like to swap, given the chance.” I also know of a 3 step process penned down below and I hope this will help to break a negative cycle of thoughts if and when it crops up –

• Take a break to instrospect your priorities
• List down the pros and cons to decide on a path ahead
• Be prepared to wholeheartedly own the outcomes of your decision, both pleasant and unplesant

Many of us may have a watched a movie called ‘Jab We Met.’ One of the dialogues from this move that still stays with me was made by the character called ‘Geet’ in it. A brief translation of what she said was “whatever will happen will happen because of me and I don’t want to blame anyone else for what happens to me“. It is such a profound statement which she made with a lot of innocence but I do agree that the worst thing is to build up regret for ourselves. It would have been ideal if everything fell into place for us but most times it doesn’t. Honestly, I think a wavy and bumpy ride through life seems a lot more appealing than floating through calm waters. Either way we are fully responsible to create our own success and if we cannot do it , we need to settle and make peace with whatever life throws our way. The choice is definitely ours!