Dear Abby: I fear father did inappropriate things to me, but don’t know how to find out

Dear Abby: I fear father did inappropriate things to me, but don’t know how to find out

Dear Abby: What can I do? I loved my parents, but I'm nagged by the feeling my father did inappropriate things to me when I was little, but don't know for sure. iStock photo

Dear Abby: When I was young and even as I grew older, my father touched me inappropriately. It made me uncomfortable even as an adult. I feel like when I was very small, something more may have happened. I may have been drugged to keep me from remembering. I know a few weird things that went on, and my mother knew about it. I always felt uncomfortable around him. Yet I loved my parents very much. I have the weirdest dreams about them doing things to me that I don’t like.

I have been in therapy before but not necessarily about this issue. I know I was my father’s favorite child because I was always pleasant, more than my sister. Our parents are both dead now and have been for many years. I don’t want to think bad thoughts about them, but I wish I knew for sure what happened. Do you have any advice for me? I hate myself for thinking bad about the parents I loved so much. They were good to me and my sister growing up.

-- Needing Clarity in Alabama

Dear Needing Clarity: The first person you should talk to about this is your sister, who was always “less pleasant” to your father than you were. It might be enlightening. However, if it isn’t, please talk with a licensed psychotherapist about your persistent bad dreams. It won’t be the first time a therapist has heard a story like this, and you deserve to have peace of mind.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, California 90069. Copyright 2024, Andrews, McMeel Syndication.

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