CLEVELAND, Ohio - Like the camel, memorably called "a horse designed by a committee," but worse, the College Football Playoff is a jumble of contradictory designs.
If you're going somewhere you might get thirsty, a camel is a fine creature to have around.
If you're trying to administer a national championship, the CFP in its current form is marred by subjective judgment, flawed compromise, and an exclusionary result that disenfranchises the traditional powers it is meant to placate while also snubbing the new powers rising from places known for home fries and hash browns (Boise State), or Disney mice and ducks (Central Florida).
Alabama, Clemson, Notre Dame and Oklahoma make up this year's field.
Every game doesn't always matter
The CFP casts itself as the guardian of the regular season, because "every game matters," but cheapens it by admitting to its little playoff quartet teams that don't even win their league's division (Alabama 2017, Ohio State 2016.)
It asks almost everyone, blueblood or upstart, to lay it on the line in conference championship games, even if they are rematches (Texas-Oklahoma, this season), yet gives an appalling pass on the extra game to Notre Dame
The Irish bye
This is because Notre Dame is often the only football independent worth mentioning. And because the Irish squeaked by big names Michigan (which came within 23 points of Ohio State) and Southern Cal (which, at 5-7, had its worst team since 2000 and its fewest victories since 1991.) Notre Dame's highest-ranked victim outside of the Wolverines was No. 20 Syracuse.
It seems fitting that the CFP selection committee, like the Last Supper, has 13 members, providing enough betrayal and scheming to account for the presence of several Judases.
Two straight years of B10, Pac-12 snubs
Ohio State (12-1) finished sixth, behind two-loss Georgia. The Buckeyes and the Pac-12 champion, Washington, were snubbed by committee chairman Rob Mullens of the Nike-owned subsidiary known as the University of Oregon and his cohorts.
The Buckeyes and Huskies will meet Jan.1 in the Rose Bowl.
This makes back-to-back years two of the most prestigious and storied conferences and their fans have had no representative.
It is frankly hard to believe that Power 5 conference fans and commissioners will stand for this.
The OSU vs. OU decision
Ohio State owned one-point victories at Maryland, where the Buckeyes twice trailed by 14 points, and at Penn State where the Nittany Lions led by 12 points in the fourth quarter. This was a very tough environment, with the game held on a White Out night.
Oklahoma, was judged superior, because its loss was by three points on a neutral field to traditional rival Texas and Ohio State's was by 29 in an actual road game at Purdue.
Oklahoma also gave up 40 or more points five times, including four in a row, played a 59-56 flag football game at West Virginia, and was taken to overtime before subduing a service academy, Army.
Eight teams, no wild-cards,
Fixing this mess is actually simple:
Every Power 5 conference champion qualifies for the CFP. There are no wild cards.
The defenders of the current format say it makes every game matter.
The sensible change is to make every conference game matter more than anything else. Like the World Series, playoff teams will have to win a conference "pennant" to qualify.
Three additional spots are guaranteed to a mix of independents (most likely, Notre Dame or Brigham Young) and non-Power 5 schools.
Cries of academic hardship during the protracted playoffs ring hollow. The FCS schools hold a 24-team playoff, with four or even five wins needed, and the ivory towers still stand.
It's time to put the camel out to pasture. Er, oasis.