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If you're calling this soda, you're not talking like a Clevelander. (Jannes Pockele, Flickr)
CLEVELAND, Ohio -- Politicos visiting Cleveland for the Republican National Convention this summer might accidentally order soda, or not know that when you ask Clevelanders for directions, the distance will be in minutes, not miles.
Cleveland.com wants to help these poor souls out by teaching them how to talk like they're from here. That includes teaching them the difference between stadium and ball park mustard (you have to pick a side), that those things on your feet are tennis shoes, not sneakers, and people from the West side rarely travel to the East side, and vice versa.
We're hoping to save them from asking what paczki, Slider or corn hole is.
So what do we include in our guide? Leave your suggestions in the comments, with Clevelanders' quirks or unique phrases. Or tweet reporter Emily Bamforth at @EmilyMBamforth.
By the way, The New York Times also created a quiz that will tell you what dialect your speech most closely resembles. Take it here and see where you fall.