I get the feeling that the sooner that trial in the Manhattan courthouse goes to jury, the better for us all, because it seems to me that, here in the homestretch, the entire exercise is in danger of going to the zoo and never returning. Inside the courtroom, defense attorney Todd Blanche has led Michael Cohen through all the shenanigans in which he engaged on the former president*’s behalf in an attempt to delegitimize everything Cohen has done since flipping on his former boss, apparently in the belief that nobody outside the courthouse has ever a seen a legal drama in which somebody “turns state’s.”
Outside, in a desperate attempt to keep the public’s interest, the TV coverage is starting to slide toward the notion that Blanche has been brilliant in his cross-examination of Cohen. Meanwhile, someone released a series of penis-shaped balloons with the names and faces of various Trump antagonists attached to them. In addition, Thursday’s emissaries from the cult’s Washington outpost included Reps. Lauren Boebert, Matt Gaetz, Andy Biggs, and Anna Paulina Luna in what can fairly be called the D-Team. At least nine of them were there and, as The Hill shrewdly pointed out, this completely banjaxed the GOP’s wafer-thin majority in the House.
The trip to New York comes on what was scheduled to be a busy day in particular for the House Oversight Committee and the House Judiciary Committee. Both had scheduled morning hearings for a top GOP priority: holding Attorney General Merrick Garland in contempt of Congress.
A source confirmed to The Hill on Wednesday that the last-minute shift in the Oversight schedule was to allow the lawmakers to make the trip to New York. Trekking to Trump’s trial means Gaetz and Biggs will miss the Judiciary hearing on the matter, while Oversight members such as Boebert and Luna may be back for the hearing that has since been moved to 8 p.m. EDT. “Due to member schedule conflicts, the markup is now starting at a different time to accommodate members’ schedules,” a spokesperson for the House Oversight Committee told The Hill on Wednesday.
Any late return could also complicate other matters for House Republicans. The chamber is voting at 4 p.m. on a bill to reverse Biden’s hold on certain transfers of arms to Israel. The White House has said Biden would veto the bill. A number of Democrats had signaled some support for the measure, but Democratic leaders are now whipping against it. As a result, heavy absences by Republicans could make it difficult for GOP leaders to get it across the finish line.
Naturally, the business of governing the nation must give way to their obligation to go to New York to pay homage to their God-Emperor Schitzinpants. The difference between the members of Thursday’s congressional pilgrimage and the clutch of penis-shaped balloons that took flight not far from them isn’t vast.
Charles P Pierce is the author of four books, most recently Idiot America, and has been a working journalist since 1976.
