Chev Chelios: He's still on the hunt for his stolen heart, screwing his girlfriend in public places, unafraid to shove a machine gun up a bad guy's keister, and spewing lines of profanity faster than you can say -- nevermind. That's Jason Statham, back for the ridiculously outrageous, over-the-top frenzy that is the sequel to the tamer 2006 Crank. In it he is frantically searching for the Chinese mobster who stole his heart, replacing it with a battery-powered substitute that requires constant jolts of electricity to keep going: cue scenes of Chev attaching jumper cables to his nipples, licking a high-voltage power line and creating friction with his girlfriend on the horse racetrack at Hollywood Park. If you're looking for straightforward action or safely PG-13 thrills, this ain't it, but is a heckuva good time.
Along the way he gets more nuisance than assistance from Bai Ling as a language-challenged Chinese hooker (did they plan to use those subtitles? She's funny as hell though) and a gay Mexican with Full Body Tourette's syndrome who is the brother of Chev's dead friend. It's quite possibly the most insane movie you'll ever see -- whether that's good or bad is your call.
Also new:
Dance Flick Two generations of the Wayans family join in for this good-natured send-up of -- you guessed it, dance flicks like Step Up, You Got Served and Flashdance.
Valentino: The Last Emperor Engaging docu of the famous fashion designer with appearances by Gwyneth Paltrow, Elton John, Anna Wintour and others.
