What do you do if you lack assertiveness and confidence in the workplace?

1. Recognise that it's natural for doubts to increase when you move up to higher levels. Happens in sport. Happens in high-performing roles at work. Recalibrating yourself is wise. 2. Remember that you were invited to join this team for a reason. Reconnecting to that will help you accept your worth. Assertivness will come from that. 3. Accept that you may need to practice variations of assertivness to fit the circumstances. When you know that you have several approaches inside your tool box, you will feel more equipped to meet any potential pushback, whether inside of you or external.

You need ascertain and be confident at your workplace. You need to identify the barriers that affect your assertiveness. Maybe your untenable beliefs, lack of confidence and self-esteem could be factors affecting your personality. You need make a list of factors that limits your ability to be assertive at your workplace, you can work on them to improve yourself with a coach, mentor or a professional psychologist.

'Face your fears and do it anyway' - I love this quote and the book by Dr Susan Jeffers, whose teachings help people build confidence and go after what they want to achieve. Begin by being honest with yourself and writing down what truly holds you back... From my coaching experience, it's the fear of being seen as a failure that limits people's confidence. Once they let go and realize that failure isn't the only possible outcome, and even if it does occur, there will always be a way forward confidence begins to grow.

In addressing a lack of assertiveness and confidence in the workplace, consider the role of your inner state. Often, these challenges stem from identifying too closely with the ego, which feeds on comparison and fear of judgment. Cultivating presence helps to shift perspective from ego-driven reactions to a more centered/peaceful state of being. Practice observing your thoughts and emotions without attachment, recognizing them as transient experiences that don't define your true self. Through this, you can find a foundation of inner peace and confidence that is not easily shaken by external circumstances. From this strength, assertiveness becomes an authentic expression of your needs and boundaries, communicated with clarity and calmness.

Identifying your barriers is indeed the crucial first step toward increasing your assertiveness and confidence in the workplace. Understanding the roots of these challenges can illuminate the path forward. It might be deep-seated beliefs from past experiences, fear of negative feedback, or simply not knowing how to articulate your thoughts in a confident manner. These barriers can act like invisible handcuffs, limiting your professional growth and personal satisfaction.

You need to set your hoal realistically, based on your skillsets, abilities and available resources. You may need to change your behaviors for betterment. You need to write down your goals split into several small ones and have a schedule to follow each of them diligently.

Start by setting small goals for assertive behavior. For example, contribute at least one idea in your next team meeting. Achieving these can build your confidence over time.

you goals have to align with your aspiration and position. assertiveness and confidence mean different things at different levels of the organization. It has to align with your personal objectives and values and where you are in the organization.

What is more important is practicing your skills regularly and looking for weak points and overcome them. You need to gather courage and confidence to motivate yourself with a positive thinking. You can adopt classical methods like role plays, rehearsals and recording your actions so you can rewind and look for weak spots for improvement.

Learn the difference between passive, aggressive, and assertive communication. Practice speaking clearly and directly about your needs, feelings, and rights in a respectful way. Also, Before entering a situation where you need to be assertive, prepare what you want to say. Rehearsing aloud can boost your confidence.

Start assertiveness and confidence in your comfort zone. Who are the people and situations your are comfortable with. Adjust you communication style in those settings to start building a new habit.

Understand you emotions - confidence and assertiveness are speaking the truth. People will disagree - but how you present yourself is only your business - what others think of you is not something you should worry about. Only, be honest and professional - if someone is offended that's their business not yours.

When you lose confidence, it is natural that you will be emotionally affected. You need to manage emotions, with positive thinking with bold outlook. You can spend time in meditation, doing physical exercises, calming yourself and listening to your favorite music. "Mindset" matters the most, in developing one's personality. You need to gather confidence in yourself and surely you can see improvement in yourself.

Visualize yourself handling situations with assertiveness and confidence. This mental rehearsal can prepare you emotionally for real-life interactions.

In addressing a lack of assertiveness and confidence, it's essential to understand that these qualities are not about suppressing emotions or adopting a facade of strength. Rather, true assertiveness and confidence stem from a deep connection with your inner being, beyond the ego's fears and desires. Practice presence, becoming aware of your emotions without being controlled by them. This awareness allows you to respond rather than react, grounding your actions in authenticity. Cultivate self-compassion, recognizing that challenges are opportunities for growth. As you align more closely with your true self, assertiveness and confidence naturally emerge, not as strategies but as expressions of your inherent wholeness and clarity.

Getting out of lack of confidence takes time and sincere efforts. Your need to believe in yourself and learn new skills and practice them regularly. Whenever you see some progress in your efforts, do not hesitate to pat on your back and be happy about your performance. You need to celebrate "success", however small it maybe.

To effectively celebrate your achievements: Set aside time regularly to reflect on your progress. Create a "success journal" to document instances of assertiveness and confidence. Share your milestones with supportive friends, family, or colleagues. Reward yourself with meaningful treats or experiences that acknowledge your hard work.

A very important component of confidence is to know what you are good at, what do people praise you for? What is your natural gift? Knowing this helps you to determine if you are in the right place in your career. Be yourself, be authentic, don’t try to be like someone else. E.g., if you are excellent at story telling, use story telling to present your work. Know your subject and understand what is expected of you. It takes different personality types and diverse thinking to deliver a team’s best. Silence is golden. It enables reflection and thought provoking contribution. Get a mentor that believes in you and encourages you to be the best you are. I encourage anyone not feeling confident and assertive to Fear Not!There is help around you

Lacking confidence can hold you back. Here's how to find your voice: a) Identify Your Goals: Start by pinpointing situations you want to handle better. Do you struggle to speak up in meetings or delegate tasks? b) Practice Makes Progress: Role-play conversations & rehearse "I" statements to express needs clearly & confidently. ️ c) Body Language Matters: Make eye contact & maintain good posture. Projecting confidence can boost your inner-self too! d) Celebrate Wins! Acknowledge your progress, no matter how small. This reinforces positive behavior.

To facilitate continuous learning and growth: Dedicate time regularly for personal development, whether through reading, listening to podcasts, or engaging in professional workshops. Set specific, measurable goals for your development and track your progress. Seek feedback from peers, mentors, and direct reports to identify areas for improvement. Reflect on your experiences, considering what you learned and how you can apply those lessons in the future.

Building confidence and assertiveness as a habit. Believing that you can use these as a tool to make a powerful impact in what you do is the key.

I once coached a high-potential executive who lacked confidence. Assertiveness was a development area. I probed into his beliefs about assertiveness and tried to find out why he needed to showcase more confidence. We also did a Strengths assessment to identify his strengths After some exploration, we were able to find the key reasons. We used the strengths approach and set small, doable actions, and I acted as an accountability partner. His success in those actions motivated him to do more, and this is how he shifted from a non-assertive, less confident executive to a highly competent and confident leader.

Be Wonder Woman for 2 minutes! As crazy as it sounds power poses (yes channelling your best Linda Carter!) is a way to ‘feel big’. This has been proven to increase testosterone levels, helping you feel more confident, whilst simultaneously reducing cortisol and feelings of stress and anxiety. I use this technique in my coaching often. It works!!

And…. MAKE A NEW MINDSET😀 Is this possible? Yes. How do I know? I’ve done it! And I’ve seen others do it; individuals and teams!! Mindset isn’t the only element. But, it is an essential element. And may be THE essential element that enables the others. Transformation is enabled through a renewed mind ie mindset. A deeper issue is ‘heart-set’ ie what is your heart set on? What are your motivators and drivers and how can you draw on these to re-inspire belief? What past victories can you remember? And who can you call on to remind you? Great teams know how to do this; call each other on through adversities. Mindsets are made and maintained, it’s an intentional ongoing process: renew, review, renew… As my Nana said; “It’s mind over matter!”