Calling The Shots: Life. and How To Have One
Calling The Shots: Life. and How To Have One
5 TOMORROWS NEWS: stylish helmets 13 CONTACT: bitch and moan 14 HEALTH: run, baby, run 15 MANUAL: download your textbooks 16 JAYPLAY SAYS ... : things we love 19 SPEAK: dance of life
calendar
thursday, jan. 15
The Noise FM/The Abracadabras/Many Moods a Day/Ample Branches. The Jackpot Music Hall, 10 p.m., 18+, $5-7 Airwave the Messenger/American Lowlife/From Quite Arms. The Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., 21+, $3 Lawrence Soul Club/ Sadie Soul/Hector the Selector. The Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., 21+, $2 Superfresh and DJ Cyrusd. The Eighth Street Tap Room, 10 p.m., 21+
friday, jan. 16
Stolen Moments: The First 100 Years of Jazz. The Lied Center, 7:30 p.m., all ages, $9-24 Brandon Jenkins. The Bottleneck, 9 p.m., 18+ Billy Wasung Band. The Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., 21+, $4 Latin/Mouth/David Hasselhof on Acid. The Jackpot Music Hall, 10 p.m., 18+, $5-7 The Dactyls/Rooftop Vigilantes. The Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., 21+, $3 Scenebooster Soundsystems Sweat/Miles Bonny. The Eighth Street Tap Room, 10 p.m., 21+, $3
saturday, jan. 17
University of Costa Rica/KU Baroque Ensemble. The Lied Center, 7:30 p.m., all ages, free The Schwag. The Granada, 8 p.m., all ages, $8 Cedric Burnside and Lightnin Malcolm/ Brody Buster Band. The Bottleneck, 9 p.m., all ages, $8-9 Thee Fleshapoids/ Sinks/Fag Cop. The Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., 21+, $3 ManChild. The Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., 21+, $4
sunday, jan. 18
One Blood/Trapped Under Ice/Dirty Money/Full Blown Chaos/Reign Supreme. The Jackpot Music Hall, 7 p.m., 18+, $10-12 The Gloves. The Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., 21+, $2
monday, jan. 19
Fag Cop/Girls of Gravitron. The Replay Lounge, 10 p.m., 21+, $2
venues
The Jazzhaus 926 1/2 Massachusetts St. Lawrence, KS 785.749.1387 The Jackpot Music Hall 943 Massachusetts St. Lawrence,KS 785.843.2846 The Eighth Street Tap Room 801 New Hampshire St. Lawrence, KS 785.841.6918 The Replay Lounge 946 Massachusetts St. Lawrence, KS 785.749.7676 The Lied Center 1600 Stewart Drive Lawrence, KS 785.864.3469 The Bottleneck 737 New Hampshire St. Lawrence, KS 785.841.5483
wednesday, jan. 21
My Dear Disco. The Bottleneck, 9 p.m., all ages Karaoke. The Jackpot Music Hall, 10 p.m., 18+, $2 The Acoustic Jam Thing. The Jazzhaus, 10 p.m., 21+, $2 Pride Night. The Granada, 9 p.m., 18+, $5.
I was rightfully duped. I was scrambling for a second job (the 12-hour-aweek campus job wasnt cutting it) and the bills needed to be paid. In a lapse of judgement or maybe out of innocent curiosity, I called the BARTENDING. UP TO $300 A DAY. NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY. TRAINING PROVIDED. ad in a newspapers classifieds. Id skipped over the ad a hundred times before, but this time it was too perfect to pass up. $300 a day? Score. No experience? Right down my alley. Training provided? Easy cheesy. Upon reaching a party on the other line, a gruff-sounding man clicked on and I knew it really was too good to be true. Turns out, all the training was from home with a convenient kit they mail you. When he started explaining how simple it was to pass the final test with a mere 70 percent, I gave him the click. Id known that bartenders around Lawrence worked their way up from table washing and clearing jobs when everyone lumbered out of the bar, but I figured maybe I
editors note
could work my way in via an 800 number. Bartending, though, as I learned in Briannes bartending story on page 10, is more than a perfect pour. It takes a certain kind of person to handle intoxicated strangers. I dont think I could take cleaning up an inebriated strangers vomit, breaking up a fight between two drunk parties who dont even remember what they were fighting about, or socializing in an attempt to get a bigger tip as part of my job description. A mysterious atmosphere surrounds most bartenders of the bars I frequent. I never know how friendly I need to be to get the best drink, or if a tip even really matters. I sometimes want to take my $2 tip from my $3 drink and wave it in front of their face just to make sure they know to liquor me up upon my refill. I did end up finding another part-time job that semester: yard work for two hours once a week at about 23 dollars a pop. It was no $300, but I got a nice tan out of it. And yes, the job was from the classifieds, no training required. Matt Hirschfeld, editor
Editor Matt Hirschfeld Associate editor Jessica Sain-Baird Designers Erica Birkman, Lauren Cunningham Contact Elliot Kort, Stephanie Schneider Health Sachiko Miyakawa, Megan Weltner Manual Becka Cremer, Adam Schoof Notice Madeline Hyden, Ross Stewart, Zach White Play Kelly Breckunitch, Tanner Grubbs, Kristopher McDonald Contributors Mark Arehart, Drew Anderson, Alicia Banister, Chance Dibben, Mia Iverson, Carly Halvorson, Daniel Nordstrom,
jayplayers
Meghan Nuckolls, Abigail Olcese, Brieun Scott, Kelci Shipley, Amanda Sorell, Derek Zarda Creative consultant Carol Holstead Contact us [email protected] Jayplay The University Daily Kansan 111 Stauffer-Flint Hall 1435 Jayhawk Blvd. Lawrence, KS 66045 785.864.4810
18 Tables
notice
Boycotters want people to see the movie Milk, but not at Cinemark movie theaters
Who is Harvey Milk?
In 1977, Harvey Milk became the first openly gay man elected to any substantial political office in the United States. Milk served almost eleven months as city supervisor of San Francisco and was responsible for passing a stringent gay rights ordinance in the area, which barred anti-gay discrimination. On November 27, 1978, Daniel White, an anti-gay conservative and fellow supervisor, shot and killed Milk and San Francisco Mayor, George Moscone. A little more than two weeks earlier, White, who had recently resigned because he claimed the annual salary wasnt enough to support his family, demanded his job back. White became angry when Moscone denied his requests to return. Milk was 48-years-old and Moscone was 49 when White returned to city hall 17 days later to assassinate the two. A jury found White guilty of voluntary manslaughter and he was sentenced to serve seven and two-thirds years (his sentence was eventually reduced to five years for time served and good behavior). Whites defense attorney brought in a psychologist to testify that junk food had intensified Whites depression. The so-called Twinkie defense was later banned. The Mayor of Castro Street: The Life and Times of Harvey Milk by Randy Shilts
Contributed photo
A donation to the Yes on 8 campaign by Alan Stock, CEO of Cinemark Theaters, led to an effort to get 50,000 people to commit to see Milk, a film about Californias first openly gay elected official, at a competitors theater.
Cinemark theaters in an e-mail to members after he learned about Stocks donation. The boycott marks one of the few times members of the bear community have been actively involved in a political issue, Galleni says. Hundreds of people in our social group see movies at Cinemark, Galleni says. We have bought thousands of dollars in movie tickets from Cinemark so after hearing about Stocks donation, we decided to boycott Cinemark by not going there anymore. Scott Winer, 2008 graduate, says he would
choose to see the movie somewhere else if Cinemark was in Lawrence. The closest Cinemark theaters to Lawrence are in Merriam and Kansas City, Missouri. For me, I dont know how you could support Cinemark whose CEO encourages antigay rights, Winer says. I think this boycott is great, especially with the past election. Everyone is looking through rose colored glasses because Obama won but we cant forget that on that same day, peoples rights were actually being taken away because Proposition 8
passed. Alex Earles, Salina sophomore, says he was against Prop. 8 and will encourage his family and friends to see the movie, Milk, but not at Cinemark theaters. I wanted to change my Facebook status when I heard about Stocks donation, Earles says. Ive encouraged my friends and family to see the movie but now Ill have to persuade them to see it somewhere else. JP
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Stylish safety
Though wearing a bicycle helmet can save your life, being caught wearing one can make anyone into an instant fashion victim. Danish hat-maker Yakkay (www. yakkay.com) has found a stylish solution. Yakkay starts off with a topof-the-line helmet, which comes with various inserts and a stainless steel buckle to ensure a snug, comfortable fit with plenty of ventilation for Contributed photos those hot rides. But the street appeal comes in the form of a cover that is placed over the helmet. Yakkay makes a diverse line of helmet covers that are made to look like hats. From a 1920s-style cloche to a modern newsboy cap, Yakkay has got you covered with cautious panache. Michael Eide, CEO of Yakkay, says that the goal of making these helmet covers is to equally unite style and safety. But bikes are not the only place for potential noggin injuries. Winter sports carry a huge risk for cranial affliction because of high speeds, unforgiving trees and inexperienced participants. The Breckenridge Hat Company (www.breckenridgehatcompany. com) makes snazzy fleece covers for helmets worn during skiing, snowboarding or tubing for extra warmth, an added fashion statement and more reason to wear protective headgear. Madeline Hyden
The Pieroguys
Its easy to get tired of the typical late night snacks. Hamburgers. Pizza. Burritos. But its 3 a.m. and you want something a little more interesting. A different late night snack has arrived in Lawrence: pierogiesthough it is a new late night snack that takes some forethought. A pierogie is a dumpling stuffed with a variety of fillings spanning from the traditional breakfast burrito to apple pie to a meat lovers pizza. Theyre now made locally by The Pieroguys. We want to appeal to college students, says Frank Gazella Jr., Pieroguys owner. Its different than any other late night food in town.We want to start a new tradition in Lawrence with this food. Buy them frozen, take them home, and then cook them in whatever fashion suits youfrying, boiling, baking or microwaving. Pierogies are a popular food in northeast Pennsylvania, Gazella said. I transferred here for school and was out late one night with a bunch of my buddies when I wanted something to eat. I said I wanted a pierogie. None of them knew what that was. This is not to label a pierogie as only a snack. Theyre workable into Contributed photo most any meal. They are good for everything. Great side dish, appetizer, late night food, snack or entre, said Gazella. I had them recently and my only word of advice is to serve them with sauce. Otherwise theyre a little too dry for anyones taste. For more information about The Pieroguys, visit www.pieroguys.com. Ross Stewart
18 TO ENTER
THURSDAY NIGHT
DOORS OPEN 9PM
EVERY
$2
21 TO DRINK
FEATURING
COAT CHECK
January 15, 2009
notice
Combining both prepared video and live skits, 2006 graduate Paul Santos puppet troupe, Felt Show, perverts the warm, fuzzy childhood associations most people have with puppets with dark adult themes. Over the past four years, Felt Show has grown to a cast of 20 puppets. After performing at local venues such as Hashinger Hall, Jackpot Music Hall and the Granada, Santos and crew are looking toward a more ambitious platform: television.
How long have you been working with puppets and what drew you to them as medium for live comedy?
Puppets are really dynamic in the way that they allow you to have a different experience with an audience. They get used to music and bands and such but with a puppet they get something they havent really been accustomed to.
Paul Santo, 2006 graduate, says the Jim Henson studio was one of his biggest influences.
How does scripting work for you and your crew? Is the process more democratic or is there one person guiding sessions along?
What were your inspirations and Its democratic in that if anybody has an idea influences in building your puppet they want to write I give them credence to be able to do that. But usually its me pushing ensemble?
I would say the work from the Jim Henson studio and most of that stuff. Not really into a lot of the puppet stuff thats been going on right now, like Wonder Shozen and Crank Yankers. it forward because I have the total vision to combine everything together.
How do you deal with feeling out what is funny and what is not funny? Whats funny in you and your crews eyes, as to opposed to how people react?
We try to tailor our shows after what an audience reacts to. So were really a rough draft kind of thing in that we go do a show and after that show we evaluate what people laughed at and what didnt get laughs and then we change the show accordingly. We want to give the audience a singular experience. We do try to tailor things depending on how each show goes.
Have there been times when you felt like maybe you crossed a line with a skit that was too offensive?
Uhhh a couple times. We had a skit that a Christian person labeled anti-Semitic, but then a Jewish person found it really, really funny.
Your shows combine live puppet work with video. What have been some challenges youve faced by
Chance Dibben
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The living room has a warm feeling to it. Theres a fireplace along one wall and bookshelves along the other. The furniture was probably picked up off the side of the road during move-out week on campus, but its still in good condition. The glass coffee table is Windexed and nearly always smudge-free. If it werent for the inflammatory political posters that line the walls or the bookshelves filled with radical anarchist publications, this could be anybodys house.
Maybe its not what youd expect from a group of Lawrence radicals who opened up their home to the collective public in September 2001. Maybe youd expect something more reminiscent of the crust punk era of the 60s and 70s. Maybe youd expect a little more chaos out of a space that identifies itself with political anarchism. I think when we first started people expected to see a lot of dirty patched up crusted punk kids, says Dave Strano, a 27-year-old Lawrence resident who became involved with the Mother Earth Collective, 1305 Tennessee St., shortly after it began. Weve done a lot of work to dispel that image. We try to make our space as clean and comfortable as possible. A lot of people arent used to the subject matter were talking about and it can be kind of intimidating. We want people to feel comfortable. On any given day, residents of the Mother Earth Collective might have walked into the
chaos
Anarchism?
According to Infoshop.org, an online anarchist community, anarchy is about more than being purely antigovernment or anti-state. Anarchism is a political theory that believes the best society is one without political, economic or social hierarchies. They believe in anarchy, the absence of rulers, as a viable social system which would address mans most basic needs of liberty, equality and solidarity. In general, anarchists aim to create a society based upon individual freedom and voluntary co-operation. The website says that liberty without equality is only liberty for the powerful, and equality without liberty is impossible. For anarchists, a person cannot be free if they are subject to state or capitalist authority. Many different variations of anarchism exist but all share the common belief in opposition to government and opposition to capitalism.
What is
The Solidarity! Revolutionary Center and Radical Library offers a free lending library, free computer access and Internet, and free meeting spaces.
overwhelmed
by the cost of
play
textbooks?
guarantee
lowest prices!
to have the
We
Lets take a road trip. Gather the friends, the old Corolla, a few scarves and maybe the dog. Let the windows hang loose, open just enough for your hand to ride the currents and flick pumpkin seeds. Make a few sideways glances, smiling, to your comrade in the back seatbut not too many. Tap your foot on the floorboard blanketed with old receipts, all the while knowing how important this moment truly is. Andrew Frederick, Shawnee junior, has that certain way with wordsto create a world at the flick of a beat and the hum of a lyric, such as experienced with the song, AA Batteries. As lead singer and songwriter for Frederick and the Six Angry Contributed photo Telephonesa seven-member ensemble of violins, horns, saxophones Frederick and the Six Angry and the occasional (subtle) owl noiseFrederick creates music to Telephones is playing at The Wonka House, 726 Misemphasize and contextualize moments born out of peaks and rhythms. souri St., 9 p.m. on Saturday. With help from co-writer and long-time friend, Austin Quick, sophoThe band plans to release more, Frederick aims to unfold a story, in dramatic structure, for each a nine-song album on both of their songs; adding each instrument, or the coalescence of all, only CD and cassette soon. when crucial to the lyrical plotline. All the subtleties of a chime or the bellow of a horn become necessities. While growing up watching musicals like West Side Story and attending live orchestras at Theatre in the Park in Shawnee, its no surprise Frederick has a talent for composing unique melodic pop. Check the groups Myspace page for news and to a few songs from the upcoming album, including AA Batteries, to see where they take you. Tanner Grubbs
This Weekend:
for early mornings and late evenings, get a jolt from Scooters
1741 Massachusetts
(across from dillons)
Now located at
785-856-2870
Slowly, begrudgingly, we allow ourselves to realize a new semester is upon us. For many students, the zombie-like jaunt to classes starting just after the break of dawn seems daunting. For others, those long, sleepless nights spent crafting papers and cramming for tests are once again becoming a frightening reality. When it feels as if your motivation has peaked and subsequently plummeted, you may want to stop at Scooters Coffeehouse Drive Thru, Ninth and Iowa streets just behind Zarco 66. From coffee to smoothies (piping hot to fingernumbing cold), hot chocolate to iced tea, Forbidden Photo illustration by Kristopher McDonald Fruit to Mocha, Scooters has a seemingly endless array A new stop for anything from coffee to of choices to satisfy that mid-morning hunger pang or smoothies to tea has made its debut at late-night caffeine craving. Scooters is open 6 a.m. to Ninth and Iowa streets. Scooters Coffeehouse Drive Thru provides its consumers 10 p.m. Monday through Saturday and 7 a.m. to 10 p.m. with energy, says manager Steve Martin. Sunday. A recent excursion through Scooters yielded a 16-ounce iced latte and a 16-ounce Caramelicious smoothie for $7.08. Scooters manager Steve Martin says the coffee shop works hard to satisfy its customers needs. Our coffee definitely provides our consumers with energy, Martin says. Energy to work, energy to study or energy to do whatever it is they need to get done. The stores proximity to campus also makes Scooters appealing to students, Scooters employee Katy Poff says. Its so much easier for students to come by here when its so close to them, Poff says, rather than driving all the way downtown to shop at Starbucks or another coffee house. Kristopher McDonald
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Out About
[ what would you do with a million dollars? ]
Monica Roberts, Overland Park sophomore: Id blow it all. Id just go shopping and pay off my credit card debt.
Grayson Ediger, Lenexa junior: I would go backpacking across Europe and travel the world.
Brandon Komp,Wichita freshman: I would invest it in the stock market, make sure its secure stocks though, not volatile stocks.
Katie Sanders, Lenexa junior: I would probably save some of it and probably travel around the world and buy a nice car.
Jeff Hays, Kansas City, Kansas, junior: I would buy a minor league baseball team.
Adam Weigel, Brookville junior: Id buy a seat in the donor section of Allen Fieldhouse and actually cheer during the game.
Maria Carr, Kansas City, Kansas, junior: Id probably buy an island and live on it.
Millie Angleton,Towanda junior: Id buy a house and invest in it. Kelsey Allen, St. Louis, Missouri, senior: I would probably travel all over. Id have to travel first class and do everything first class.
Josh McCullough, St. Louis, Missouri, senior: Id probably retire and not invest it in the economy right now. Kelly Breckunitch
feature
But bartenders have a lot more on their plates than just pouring drinks. They have to be able to deal with the stress of serving an unrelenting wall of customers and they have to put up with all of the stupid things we wont remember saying in the morning. Its their job to make sure the party runs smoothly, and tonight theyre calling the shots.
Anyone who frequents the bars knows the difference between good and bad bartenders and the ones who keep you coming back every weekend have that certain je ne sais qua that extends far beyond accurate pouring skills. Its very much about hospitality and about making people feel welcome, says KU graduate and Tellers bartender Whit Bones. You have to keep a smile on your face, have a good attitude and keep a quick wit. Its important for bartenders to make that connection with customers, which sometimes can mean stepping outside the prescribed role of simple bartender. Colin Mermey, a Rochester, New York, senior, bartends at the Sprint Center in Kansas City, Missouri, and says that he occasionally finds himself fulfilling the psychiatric needs of his customers. You have to deal with the people who tend to bleed themselves emotionally to you, Mermey says. All you can really do is be an active listener.You learn to kind of nod and repeat what theyve said a couple times. Thad Haverkamp, who has been a bartender for seven years at various Lawrence locations, including the Replay Lounge, the Jackpot Music Hall and currently Liberty Hall, says his job as bartender also frequently encompasses the role of peacekeeper. He says its not uncommon for him to have to step into a hostile situation and try to diffuse tensions before they escalate and become dangerous. But worse than that, he says, is the role of the babysitter. Its our job to make sure everyones having a good time and enjoying themselves so we do try and take care of the people who arent doing so well. Matt Uritis, a 2008 graduate and Louises West bartender, says that he has even gone so far as to drive a drunk customer home after a night at the bar. Hes a regular and one of my favorite people who comes into the bar, Uritis says. If it had been someone else I wouldnt have done it. Its like one of your friendsyou take care of them and they take care of you. This is just the first on a very long list of reasons why you should always try to get on your bartenders good side.Your bartender will ultimately determine how well you get served each night and its generally in your best interest to avoid a few simple things they say can get you kicked to the back of the line.
the line. Ill serve everyone else before you. Other seemingly common sense no-nos to avoid include yelling, cursing or throwing small objects at your bartender. Ive had people throw stuff at me, says the Sprint Centers Mermey. Say you give the customer a pen to sign their bill and theyll take the pen and throw it square back in your face.You know, their whiskey, god forbid, wasnt this high, or you forgot to give them a straw or something stupid. General verbal abuse is also a good one to steer clear from, says Uritis of Louises West, who once told a couple thanks guys only for the man to respond with, I didnt spend five grand on a tit job for you to call her a dude. For better service, be friendly by striking up a conversation and leave the attitude at home. On a slow night, a good way to get conversation started is to ask them to surprise you with a drink. Let them know what kind of liquor you like and then let them take it from there. Its kind of like research and design at the bar, Haverkamp says. Bartenders also like to develop camaraderie with their customers. I like the people who will only come to me for service, says Nathan Schriner, a Lawrence junior who bartended for a Club Med resort in Ixtapa, Mexico. I love for a customer to say, Youre my bartender and Im only coming to you.
Bones says the woman was a slow eater, but the man, who had finished, kept refilling on wine until he became completely trashed. But Bones says its all part of the entertainment. Sometimes its a bit fun to play with those situations and give them heavy pours just to see where it goes. It started to get awkward about the time the man started emotionally professing the many secrets of his personal life. I could tell that she was just playing with him, Bones says. He didnt realize I could hear everything. It was terribly awkward. She left alone that night and he left with all the hope in the world of seeing her again, but I knew it probably wasnt going to happen. He wasnt the first, and certainly wont be the last guy to leave the bar alone. Haverkamp says he sees many of the exact same situations played out by his customers over and over again each night. Theres not a lot of variation on what people do in bars, he says. There are many stereotypical character types and plot lines that he and his fellow bartenders frequently see acted out. I dont see too many college students at our bar. Its mostly older people, but I kind give them the same stereotypes because I can definitely see what they were like when they were younger. It just hasnt changed, Mermey says. Youll definitely have the really loud
overconfident macho guy who is totally going through a mid-life crisis ordering all the drinks he possibly can and spending a lot of money. Then you have the woman who definitely hasnt left her college years even though shes well into her 40s and will hit on all of the guy bartenders regardless of her age. Uritis says some of his most annoying customers belong to the newly 21 crowd. I hate the kids who are really young and come into the bar and dont know how to act and end up treating the bartenders like shit. Thats my biggest pet peeve, he says. Theyre finally 21 and they feel like they finally deserve to be there so theyre going to be really loud and obnoxious. Then, of course, some of the bars patrons just dont seem to fit any stereotypes at all. Haverkamp says he was bartending at a wedding at Liberty Hall when the father and brother of the groom became so belligerently drunk that they had to be removed from the building. The father of the groom at one point harassed my manager with a cake spatula, Haverkamp says. He grabbed it off the serving plate and was gesturing at him menacingly with this silver decorative cake spatula in his hand. It was possibly the dumbest thing Ive ever seen somebody do. I cant imagine what the bride had to be thinking. JP
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Matt Uritis, 2008 graduate and Louises West bartender, has driven a drunk customer home in the past. Hes a regular, Uritis says. Its like one of your friendsyou take care of them and they take care of you.
1) a. lemon twist 2) Pineapple juice and cream of coconut 3) about half an ounce 4) ale 5) cut, squeeze, slide on rim and drop in drink 6) a. .08 percent 7) 57 T-bird With Florida Plates 8) b. 5 to 8 seconds 9) Sex on the Beach, Woo Woo Shooter, Silk Panties 10) pinot grigio, chardonnay, sauvignon blanc, pinot blanc, pinot gris, Riesling, chenin blanc
Snapping your fingers at your bartender is at the top of the definitely dont list for Liberty Halls Haverkamp. Dont snap at your bartender. Snapping puts you at the back of
You should also be aware that all of your actionsevery pickup line and every awkward dance moveare just another twist or turn of plot in your bartenders own personal soap opera. I always eavesdrop, Haverkamp says. Its the best part of the job.You hear the worst pickup lines, but the scariest part is when they actually work. One of the most common plot developments that Haverkamp witnesses is the attempted pickup. Probably the worst stereotype are the guys who for some reason really think that their moves are working on the women who are obviously not interested, he says. Its usually the drunk guy who sits down next to the girl whos in the middle of conversation with her friends and no matter how many times she turns her back to him, he keeps talking. Bones, of Tellers, says that he has seen his fair share of pickups and awkward situations. He recalls a situation recently in which a man and woman appeared at the bar separately, alone and seemingly on business. They started chatting for a while and it seemed like they were doing pretty well, talking about this and that, then he got really excited, Bones says. I think he realized that he was talking to a really attractive woman who was here alone on business and he started to realize he might get some that night.
the drama
11
Bitch&
MOAN
with Carly Halvorson and Elliot Kort
Christina, senior
contact
known that my lack of relationship with him is a principal factor in why I run from every romantic relationship Ive ever known. How do I start over? Elliot: One of my personal credos is that
every person has to live on his or her terms. If youre really going to start over, you need to keep this in mind from the get-go. Let it become your mantra. If you need to walk out of your fathers life to have a healthy one of your own, then that is what you must do. With regards to starting over with other relationships, Id say you need to be constantly aware of your own state of mind. Know when your impulses and instincts are being thrown off by something, some past baggage thats still holding you down. In time, youll probably manage to let go of it all. But if not, by being conscious of everything going on in your head, at least youll be mindful enough to keep it all from hurting you any longer. Do everything on your terms, and you should be just fine.
Jodie, junior
Lately, I just havent been interested in sex. Im too tired, stressed out, insecure and worried about money. How do I get over this? Elliot: To start, let me state the utterly obvious: It is clear theres a lot on your mind. That being said, youre going to have to face a cold, hard truth.You cant always be in the mood, no matter how much you hope for the opposite. If youre looking to alter your mood, the biggest key is not to force it. Try to do little things every day that relax you and that might (hopefully) take your mind off of whatever is bugging you. Take time for yourself. And also, if your current mood fits you, dont pressure yourself to change it! Just because we can get laid all the time doesnt mean we need to. And besides, whats the point of getting all hot and bothered if you dont want to be hot and bothered? Carly: I agree with Elliotthe first and most important thing you need to do is take care of yourself. Women are more prone to getting distracted during sex than men, so having a lot on your mind can easily rob you of your libido. Take practical steps to get rid of your stressors, like creating a budget or doing some simple workouts at home. Dont expect your sex drive to magically appearjust help it come back. Make your bedroom a no bummer zone. Once you get inside, dont think about whats stressing you out. Instead, light some candles; research shows that cucumber scents can heighten arousal. Have a date night with your partner thats accompanied by some natural aphrodisiacs, like champagne and chocolate. For the finale, wear something that makes you feel sexy and put on your favorite lacy bra. When you look at yourself in the mirror and think, Damn, I look good, then youre more likely to want to have sex. Around the holidays, when Im finally home and spending time with family after months away at school, everyone is longing to ask me the same question: so are you seeing anyone? Whether I am or not is irrelevant. If I say yes, the game of 20 questions begins and Im wishing
I could disappear. If I say no, the conversation comes to a screeching halt and Im still wishing I could disappear. How can I equip myself to handle this sticky situation without disappointing my family and desperately wanting to hide under the table?
Hannah, junior
Carly: A lot of girls have that one male figure in their lives that looms ominously over every new relationship. For some, its an ex. For otherslike youits their fathers. This is especially tricky, because it is often said that girls seek out men who are similar to their fathers. Its important that you learn to separate his qualities from any prospect you may have.You cant help getting caught up in that fear that your new partner is going to turn out like your father, but once you do feel that fear, do something about it. Have a close friend sit down with you so you can distance your issues with your father from this new relationship. Dont linger on the hypothetical, What if he ? because those situations simply reinforce your feelings and give you justification for walking away. It wont be easy, but with a good support system to pick you back up, its doable.
Have relationship questions or need some advice? E-mail [email protected]. *Bitch and Moan is not to be considered as a substitute
for professional help.
Elliot: It seems to me that you have to find a middle ground.You want two things to happen: First, you want to assure your folks that their daughter isnt a shut-in. Second, you want to avoid an all-out interrogation. The next time youre home and your parents start to ask questions, throw them a curve ball. Say, Well, Ive been seeing someone. But Im not sure if theres much to it, yet, so I dont want to blow it out of proportion. This way, your parents will feel assured that youre out there meeting people. Also, its unlikely that they will dedicate a lot of energy to grilling you with questions. I mean, honestly, what kind of parents ask when youre bringing home a special someone if youre even hesitant to mention his name? With any luck, youll be out of the woods until you want to fill them in on more information. Carly: Im a big fan of those interrogations, actually. I dont get asked a million questions about anyone Im dating anymore, though, because I relied on my sarcasm instead of being straightforward. If you really want to end the interrogations once and for all, just tell them that you met your new dating buddy downtown one night after the bars were closing. He was the rugged backpacker asking for money on the corner of Mass. Street.You knew it was fate when he asked to come home with you so he could use your shower. Mention that you really wish you could see him and talk to him more often, but its difficult when he doesnt have a cell phone, a car, a bike or however much change is required to make a call on a pay phone. Say all of this with a straight face, and you should be okay. I used this story two years ago, and since then my holidays are much less intrusive. I made a resolution this year to walk out of my fathers life. Ive always
How We Met
It was more than luck that Maddie OConnor and Bill Murphy met in Ireland just about a year ago on OConnors study abroad semester. The local pub, the Old Oak, set the scene for the Irish couple. OConnor says Murphy roped her in with his Irish accent. OConnor and Murphy, both juniors at the time, laughed off the cultural differences by examining Murphys pronunciations and his use of slang terms. Kansas City native and senior OConnor considers herself Irish because of her great ancestors, but Murphy tells her otherwise. Having Irish ancestors doesnt make you Irish per se, but whos really checking, Murphy tells her. Both families have welcomed the idea of a long distant relationship and are happy for the couple, but the logistics of what would happen if the two were to marry scares them: Who would live where? How do you get a visa?
Contributed photo
For now, the couple talks every day through Skype, web cams and cell phones, just as much as most couples do, OConnor says. Every three months the two visit each other; the last visit was in Ireland over Christmas break. It must be the luck of the Irish. Stephanie Schneider
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health
running marathons
Sure, running is a great way to stay in shape, but is there a point when it becomes too excessive? How about running or training the 26 miles of a marathon? Training for a marathon or half-marathon is a great way to stay fit and lose weight, but Lance Snyder, orthopedic surgeon at the Kansas City Orthopedic Institute in Leawood, says that running marathons is not for everyone. There is a reason the first two people who ran the marathon died, Snyder says. Marathons are meant for extremely athletic people, not your average Joe. Snyder says he has many patients who decide they want to run a marathon and six weeks into their training they are struck with ailments such as Planter Fasciitis, torn ligaments, hip displacement and the list goes on. Photo illustration by Jerry Wang The stress of your body constantly hitting the hard pavement is meant for only a select group of athletes. On an average body, the stress can do much more damage than good. Snyder recommends other ways of staying in shape such as joining a gym or a local intramural group. Lauren Gray, Leawood senior, is training for her second half-marathon. The half-marathon will be held October 12 in Kansas City, Missouri. I like it because as I train, the muscle throughout my body becomes much more toned and I am able to build my endurance, Gray says. However, there are times after long runs where I have pain in my knees and hips. Gray says that the positive mental gain outweighs the physical pain. VERDICT: BAD FOR YOU, but a half-marathon in the near future isnt unrealistic. Megan Weltner
14
digital books
Save a tree or two by buying a digital textbook or finding required texts online. Many textbooks are available in digital form at the KU Bookstores or online through publishing companies or websites such as www.cafescribe. com. However, the KU Bookstores sell fewer than 10 digital textbooks each semester, says Estella McCollum, business manager for KU Bookstores. She says it appears to be a good deal at first, but many of the digital textbooks are sold as subscriptions that expire and digital textbooks have no buyback value. So if saving money is as important to you as saving trees, check these places for free digital texts. Christian Classics Ethereal Library Find full texts of classic Christian writings such as St. Augustines Confessions and Dantes Divine Comedy at www.ccel.org. Project Gutenberg Project Gutenberg (www.gutenberg.org) provides free access to content with expired copyrights. Download books such as Virgils Aeneid (required for Western Civ I) and Mary Shellys Frankenstein (required for Western Civ
DIY:
manual
II) and save a tree and some money. Stanza Download the Stanza application to your iPod Touch or iPhone through the iTunes App Store or to your computer at www. lexcycle.com to access more than 100,000 books. Many of the books are free, and most are less expensive than their print versions. Also check out the Read Green Initiative at www.goreadgreen.com, where you can get a free one-year digital subscription of your favorite magazine. Becka Cremer
If your laptop battery has lost its spunk, then you may be able to regain some of its charge. Most modern laptops use lithium-ion batteries. There is a processor in the battery that measures the charge left in the battery. Over time, the processor can misreport the charge. If your lithium-ion battery has become inaccurate, then it is time to recalibrate it. The following method is recommended by Apple for its computers.You should check with your manufacturer for its approved method, though the process will probably be similar. First, fully charge your battery and wait two hours with the AC adapter plugged into your laptop. Then unplug the AC adapter and let your computers battery run out.Your computer will go to sleep.You can either turn off your laptop or let it sleep at least five hours. Finally, plug in your AC adapter into your laptop and let it fully charge.Your battery should now give a more accurate reading. Older laptops use nickel-based batteries. These batteries can develop a memory if not charged correctly, so you should consult your
laptops manufacturer for the proper way to maintain your battery. For both lithium-ion and nickel-based batteries, you should avoid running on AC power for extended periods. Laptop batteries are like any other battery, in that they eventually die. If your battery cannot hold a charge, then you will have to buy a new one. You should not throw away your old laptop battery because it may contain toxic chemicals. AT&T, Lawrence Battery and RadioShack will recycle your laptop battery. Adam Schoof
abejakes.com
84 1-5855
January 15, 2009
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Jayplay
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January 15, 2009
says. . .
KU Fit classes
Whereas a workout class downtown may cost in the double-digits nearly a fortune for a college studentsimilar classes are offered every day in the Ambler Photo by Jon Goering/KANSAN FILE PHOTO Student Recreation Amber Long leads her yoga class in exercises at the Ambler Fitness Center for Student Recreation Center. a much more affordable price. And because KU Fit classes are taught by student instructors, that rare trip to the fitness center wont feel as strenuous as attending a class taught by a professional. Classes offered vary from cardio, strength training, cardio and strength mix, and mind and body exercises. Each class is only $3, or you can get a pass for each semester or school year. Even better, all KU Fit classes are free today and next week, and are free again during finals week.
go to
listen to
Jaydiohead
If its hard for you to find a happy medium between your favorite hip-hop and alternative music, a new album by the name of Jaydiohead may be able to cure your musical misery. The album, created by New York City producer Minty Fresh Beats, features 10 songs that mash up two of the most popular acts in music, Jay-Z and Radiohead. In addition to putting some of Radioheads catchiest beats over Jay-Zs most familiar raps, Minty Fresh Beats probably enjoyed putting together the creative song titles, such as 99 Anthems, Dirt Off Your Android and Fall in Step. Jaydiohead is available for free download at www.jaydiohead.com.
throw
an ABC party
You wont be learning much at an ABC party. Its an Anything But Clothes party, and a time to get creative. Everything and anything imaginable can be strung or glued together to create an outfit. Whip out the duct tape, string and hot glue gun and piece together an ensemble that would put a kindergarteners craft project to shame.
Plastic bags, playing cards, bubble wrap and CDs can make fun outfits.
Contributed photo
Heres some ideas to get started on an outfit: 3 playing cards as a shirt or skirt 3 duct tape bra or underwear 3 a vest of paper plates 3 a gift bag tube dress 3 a old 30-pack beer box with ribbon suspenders 3 wrapping paper with strategically placed ribbon and bows
3 a skirt of CDs 3 a bubble wrap tube top 3 plastic or paper bags fashioned in every which way 3 a Twister gameboard 3 a smartly draped sheet 3 an envelope pantsuit or dress
watch
the new season of Real World: Brooklyn
The drama, struggles and problems of the cast of eight (a departure from the usual seven) seem more real this time around. Chet is one of 10 children from a strict Mormon family in Salt Lake City. His bleach blond hair and tight clothing make him seem like a typical party boy, but he sticks with his firm beliefs of no premarital sex and no alcohol. This eccentric conservative has no qualms about voicing his opinions, which could cause conflict with JD, a gay man who became one of the youngest dolphin trainers in the world at age 18. His grandmother took him to Sea World when he was 5 and he asserted to become a dolphin trainer from at that point. He eventually graduated from the University of Miami with a degree in marine biology. His homosexuality has caused a connection with Katelynn, a transsexual person who started living as a woman at the age of 17. She was raised by a religious Italian family and is also a black belt in martial arts. This past July, she traveled to Thailand to undergo the last set of surgeries and completed the transition from man to woman. Some of the cast picked up on her diverse nature, including Ryan, an Iraq veteran who enlisted in the Army at 17. He was in the Army for three-and-ahalf years and experienced many near-death experiences. He is an amateur musician who likes to express himself through playing the guitar.Within the first episode, he has already expressed his taste for booze and refereed to Katelynn as an it, which may cause problems with Sarah, a bisexual woman who is currently in her first relationship with a man. Until now, all of her relationships have been with women. JD and Katelynn have formed a bond because of what they have experienced in the LBGT community, which could make her feel excluded, but she could be distracted by Scott, a personal trainer who has been working out since he was 14. He started his own DJ business and is the first in his family to graduate college. He obsessed with staying fit and wanting to break into the modeling industry. Another cast member fixated on beauty is Devyn, who was Miss American Teen 2005. She hopes to break into the entertainment industry and could have an easier time by standing by her mantra, It is easier to get into Heaven than into Devyn. She aspires to be an actress, singer and dancer. Another cast member who moved to New York to become a dancer is Baya, whos passionate about hip-hop culture. She occasionally suffers from panic attacks, but does not want her condition to get in the way of becoming a professional hip-hop dancer. So there you have it: eight people, one house, a whole lotta legit drama. This cast has more to offer than drunk young adults lusting after each other or the necessary alcoholinfused pick-me-up every morning that has been a staple of past seasons. Check out Real World: Brooklyn at 9p.m. central time Wednesdays on MTV.
Voted
Tonight
$1 WELLS
(Every Saturday)
GAME DAYS
10 ft. HD TV
POKER
FREE POOL
925 Iowa
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reviews
MOVIE: Gran Torino
Clint Eastwood has been nominated for 10 Academy Awards for a reason: The man makes damn good movies. Gran Torino is no exception. Eastwood plays Walt Kowalski, a bitter and racist old man who is recently widowed. The story is centered on his relationship with the sullen Thao, played by Bee Vang, a kid plagued by pressures to join his neighborhood gang. Walt takes it upon himself to teach Thao about tools, life and his baby, a 1973 Ford Gran Torino. Walt talks like your average geriatric, pissed off at the world for changing and hating any car not made in America. The racial slurs roll off his tongue like an everyday hello. But he is revealed to be an honest and decent man, who more than knows his way around a firearm. Eastwood plays a character reminiscent of the past with his fists flying before any questions can be uttered. His performance is the best so far this year, and might just hold that title for months to come.
Sharing the name of an old muscle car, Gran Torino is a film that beautifully covers a host of emotions. Could you expect anything less from someone as dedicated as Eastwood? He not only starred in and directed the film, he even sings the title song.
can deliver. This album is an innovative, eccentric, evocative and exhilarating releaseit lives up to the hype that came before it, and will generate hype for years to come.
Amanda Sorell
Mark Arehart
Abby Olcese
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speak
Danceof life
By Vicky Lu [email protected] closet to pretend I was busy. But I just could not help looking at my roommates pretty dresses and imagining how beautiful they would be on me. And then an hour before the formal, I decided to go. I had to go. My decision was not just about dancing; it was about daring the challenge of something unknown. I walked in to the room and told them I was going. After a moment of silence, the entire room burst into a cheer. Lauren danced with a curler still on her hair. She was cheering because room 209 could go together. I was cheering because finally I was being true to myself. The night was a fun blur. I met a Mongolian guy named Ider, who taught me how to do the traditional Mongolian dance. I was a little bit nervous at the beginning, but by the third song, Ider and I were in the spotlight. I couldnt follow his steps exactly, and it was probably my clumsy movements that caught the attention of the crowd, but I threw myself into the music. I knew stepping out of the comfort zone might be difficult at first, but
the courage would somehow be rewarded. In my first reporting class one year later, my journalism professor, Scott Reinardy, said if we wanted to be reporters, wed have to go out and talk to people. It sounded simple, but it was hard starting a conversation with a stranger, especially for me, whose native language is not English. But every time I was nervous knocking on the door of a city manager or calling someone I did not know for an interview, I thought of that night. I knew exactly what a reporter should be equipped withcourage. Each time I summoned the nerve to talk to someone, I got great interviews. I still cant dance today, and I am on the edge of forgetting the Mongolian dance. But I remember that winter formal night, when I took, what was for me, a huge risk. That same courage has helped me with my academic goalbeing a reporter, a storyteller who goes out of her comfort zone in search of the unknown. JP
When Chinese student Vicky Lu found the courage to go to her first formal, she learned a powerful lesson
I was sad. I tried to pretend that I really had homeIt was the night of the winter formal. All work to focus on. I kept checking my mailbox, the girls in my hall were running door-to- I kept refreshing Blackboard, and I kept my door looking at each others dresses, giv- head low so people did not see the sad look ing compliments and advice on makeup. My on my face. No mail, no updates. I started three roommates had been busy trying out calling people on my phone to avoid hearing different outfits and hairdos four hours be- my roommates conversation on makeup. No fore the winter formal started. Our room one picked up. I even tried to organize my floor was scattered with heels, headdress flowers and colorful nail polish bottles. The sweet scents perfume flooded the hallway. It was a lovely picture on a mid-November night. And yet, I was sad. I turned down my roommates suggestion of going to winter formal for the third time. I decided not to go because I did not know how to dance, and I was afraid of being embarrassed. In the Asian culture, I am taught to behave properly in Contributed photo every occasion, and I never atVickys (third from left) daring leap onto the dance floor left her with an tempt anything if I dont have lesson that has also helped her career aspirations. control over it. Since arriving in the United States two years ago, Ive been observing and trying to learn the American way of life so I would fit in. This winter formal was on my list of things to master, too. But while my roommates were crossing the days off on the calendar, looking forward to the this night, I had been hoping it would never come. That was not like me. I was usually active in all hall events such as the tie-dying party, pumpkin patch and big sis, lil sis sleepover. However, this formal was different. After watching some 19th century European love movies, I was filled with the preconception that in the formal, girls would be dressed up like princesses and circle in the ballroom. I was ashamed of my dancing skills. I was afraid Id step on someone in the ballroom or do something inappropriate. I had wanted to go to the formal from the beginning, but like any other girl, I wanted to look my best, and I was afraid I would embarrass myself. This struggling feeling almost swallowed me, and I found it hard to breathe. Vicky, you sure you dont want to go? Lauren asked. No, I guess not. I have homework to do, I said. It was obviously a liemy fading voice gave it away.
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