PSYCHOLOGICAL COUNSELLING: Obsessive preoccupation with a profession can be dangerous

Exploring career opportunities

My son is experiencing low moods after his entrance exams for the IITs. He has fared badly and is ashamed to meet his friends and relatives. He wants to stop studying and is not looking at any other options. We want him to go to any decent engineering college. The issue is complicated as my wife is under treatment for depression and her condition has worsened due to my son’s mood swings.

-Anonymous

 

You must take your wife and son for psychological counselling. Your son is in a state of shock as he probably has invested all his time and aspirations to crack the JEE. The psychologist needs to treat the shock, shame, and disappointment, which will eventually normalise his condition. Students should focus on their aspirations and work hard to get results, but an obsessive preoccupation can be harmful. You need to make him speak to a career counsellor to explore career opportunities and continue his mother’s treatment.

 

Abruptly stopping medication

My daughter has not attended school for the last 19 months. She has stopped coming out of her room. We made her attend several online therapy sessions, which did not help. In between, we invited a psychiatrist to our home to help her. Since she was an excellent art student, the psychiatrist offered her an internship, besides giving her medicines. There was a sudden improvement, and she went out for the first time for 15 consecutive days. However, she has now stopped the medicines fearing addiction and she is back to her old state.

-MK

 

Please go back to your doctor and seek advice again. Medicines are useful in treating mental illness. The psychiatrist addressed her condition and continuing the treatment will help her. Delay in treatment causes emotional agony to your daughter and further stresses her out. 

 

Dealing with mania

My brother is pursuing a master’s in biotechnology. He is not sleeping lately as he binges on TV shows and spends time watching cricket and IPL matches. Every night he sleeps only for a few hours as he spends his time watching shows. He remains erratic, tries to look happy and talks gibberish at times.

 -TG

 

Immediately take him to a psychiatrist as he is suffering from a bout of mania, which is a serious psychiatric illness. In such an episode, one can be irrationally happy, may spend excessively, and sleep less. Aggression and violence can also be seen in such people. Early treatment helps but before that find out if he is getting into drug addiction.

 

Burdened by debt

I belong to a lower middle-class family and have just finished my Engineering degree. My family just shifted to a smaller rented home after selling our small house. My mother sold her gold jewellery also recently as they want to fund my overseas education for my master's and PhD. I feel guilty and depressed. For some reason, we could not get a bank loan. I am a bright student, but I don't want to go now.

-SR

 

Many parents happily discard their life pleasures for the future of their children. There is joy in this exercise, and they do not see this as a sacrifice. Sit down with your parents and express your thoughts and feelings openly. They will bless you and share their joy. The bonding will improve and so will your resolve to give them better life once you finish your education. If the guilt interferes with your life, meet a psychologist. 

 

Boosting the self-esteem

My daughter is 18 and will soon be starting her degree course at a prominent Law school. For the last three weeks, she is keeping to herself. She is an introverted person and is very conscious of her looks and her height. We found out that she had gone to a dating site and met a few boys, after which she has gone into a shell. 

 -KT

 

Youngsters often take dating sites seriously and give unnecessary importance to physical attributes. Rejection on dating sites may be a frivolous issue, but your daughter is taking it seriously. She may have felt humiliated and traumatised online or offline. You need to be her constant companion and instead of interrogating her, encourage her to share her emotion. As she spills the beans, you will be able to understand her better. Kids with low self-esteem and poor self-image fall prey to exploitation.