Talk:"Energized and excited": Chris Hipkins becomes 41st Prime Minister of New Zealand
Note
[edit]I followed the structure of Liz Truss becomes Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, although this was obviously much longer. Heavy Water (talk) 19:35, 26 January 2023 (UTC)
- Immediately, I'm worried about the inverted pyramid structure, and while I'm fine to address it, as contributor I recommend you take the lead; after my first edits progress has been made but still Hipkins' age, political prospects viz. the October elections, and putting Ardern's last speech after how she won in the first place (???) are clearly out of order. JJLiu112 (talk) 05:56, 28 January 2023 (UTC)
- @JJLiu112: I just added a source for the "without opposition" bit, as neither of those mentioned the details of his election (which, importantly occurred on Sunday, not Tuesday). I'm also uncomfortable with calling it a "shock" resignation in wikivoice; maybe it's just me but that seems to verge on analysis.
- I've moved the "prospects" thing way up, and I think my reordering of the Ardern section is good: her resignation, she's not resigning from Parliament altogether yet, her tenure, and then the last couple public events of her premiership.
- As I don't see much else to fix, I'll resubmit now. Heavy Water (talk) 20:32, 28 January 2023 (UTC)
- By the way, I've replaced "Dame Cindy" with "Kiro"; this is what Wikipedia and the AP call her (the Guardian never mentioned her) and it sounds less biased. Heavy Water (talk) 20:39, 28 January 2023 (UTC)
- {{editprotected}}
- Per style guide "Wikinews honors the protocol common in the country of origin of any royalty mentioned"; it follows this practice should extend to Dame Cindy Kiro. JJLiu112 (talk) 20:22, 7 April 2023 (UTC)
- I am not quite understanding this. As I read the article it says "Dame Cindy Kiro" which seems to encapsulate both. SVTCobra 21:04, 7 April 2023 (UTC)
- Really? This is about the image caption? I'll fix that altogether. SVTCobra 21:08, 7 April 2023 (UTC)
Fixed --SVTCobra 21:10, 7 April 2023 (UTC)
- Really? This is about the image caption? I'll fix that altogether. SVTCobra 21:08, 7 April 2023 (UTC)
- I am not quite understanding this. As I read the article it says "Dame Cindy Kiro" which seems to encapsulate both. SVTCobra 21:04, 7 April 2023 (UTC)
- By the way, I've replaced "Dame Cindy" with "Kiro"; this is what Wikipedia and the AP call her (the Guardian never mentioned her) and it sounds less biased. Heavy Water (talk) 20:39, 28 January 2023 (UTC)
Review of revision 4705715 [Not ready]
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Revision 4705715 of this article has been reviewed by JJLiu112 (talk · contribs) and found not ready at 05:57, 28 January 2023 (UTC).
Comments by reviewer: None added. Questions about the above? Ask. If possible, please address the above issues then resubmit the article for another review (by replacing {{tasks}} in the article with {{review}}). This talk page will be updated with subsequent reviews. |
Revision 4705715 of this article has been reviewed by JJLiu112 (talk · contribs) and found not ready at 05:57, 28 January 2023 (UTC).
Comments by reviewer: None added. Questions about the above? Ask. If possible, please address the above issues then resubmit the article for another review (by replacing {{tasks}} in the article with {{review}}). This talk page will be updated with subsequent reviews. |
Review of revision 4706356 [Passed]
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Revision 4706356 of this article has been reviewed by JJLiu112 (talk · contribs) and has passed its review at 17:26, 31 January 2023 (UTC).
Comments by reviewer: We can report on other news outlets' analysis to a degree, but don't make it excessive like done with the AP. Also, generally don't wikilink positions (and make sure they're right! Will & Kate are Prince and Princess of Wales). Otherwise good. Lengthy, too...I like it! The reviewed revision should automatically have been edited by removing {{Review}} and adding {{Publish}} at the bottom, and the edit sighted; if this did not happen, it may be done manually by a reviewer. |
Revision 4706356 of this article has been reviewed by JJLiu112 (talk · contribs) and has passed its review at 17:26, 31 January 2023 (UTC).
Comments by reviewer: We can report on other news outlets' analysis to a degree, but don't make it excessive like done with the AP. Also, generally don't wikilink positions (and make sure they're right! Will & Kate are Prince and Princess of Wales). Otherwise good. Lengthy, too...I like it! The reviewed revision should automatically have been edited by removing {{Review}} and adding {{Publish}} at the bottom, and the edit sighted; if this did not happen, it may be done manually by a reviewer. |
- @JJLiu112: Madeleine, thank you so much! I think at some point I was told not to quote other outlets without attribution, as those appeared to be quotes from someone in the story. Also, I did get his position correct, though I didn't list her title (seemed redundant). Length just kind of happens, especially when citing the bloviating AP, but thank you nonetheless. --Heavy Water (talk) 18:04, 31 January 2023 (UTC)
- You're right to do so, I encourage only to cut back on it a bit :p. 'Bloviating' is probably the best way to describe that article. Re her title as in it was wikilinked Duchess of Cambridge, and anyway to say 'the Prince of Wales and his wife' would be implying she has a lesser title. --JJLiu112 (talk) 18:08, 31 January 2023 (UTC)
- OK, got it. Heavy Water (talk) 18:11, 31 January 2023 (UTC)
- You're right to do so, I encourage only to cut back on it a bit :p. 'Bloviating' is probably the best way to describe that article. Re her title as in it was wikilinked Duchess of Cambridge, and anyway to say 'the Prince of Wales and his wife' would be implying she has a lesser title. --JJLiu112 (talk) 18:08, 31 January 2023 (UTC)
American English?
[edit]Why does the title and the article use American English? The quote "I'm energised and excited" comes from The Guardian and it (correctly) uses New Zealand English. I have edited the page; please fix the page title with the correct spelling. Many thanks. Schwede66 (talk) 07:02, 4 February 2023 (UTC)
- The Wikinews author usually chooses which dialect to use in the article. The only thing we ask is that it is consistent. SVTCobra 08:32, 4 February 2023 (UTC)