Urban Counseling Collective of Oregon

Theodore Roosevelt once said that “comparison is the thief of joy.” He was right. Constantly measuring our lives against other people’s can wreak havoc on our well-being. 🤕 🧠 1) Embrace self-love Self-love is a key building block for healthy self-esteem. It asks us to celebrate our unique strengths and talents. It also invites us to put ourselves first. 🧠2)Find self-acceptance Comparison loves to latch onto self-doubt. And it’s often prompted by seeing other people reach certain life moments we’ve come to think of as milestones. Maybe it’s having a baby. Or taking a big trip. Or retiring from full-time work. 🧠3) Nurture self-compassion Self-compassion trades judgment for empathy. Instead of criticizing ourselves, we can give ourselves grace. It also means we forgive ourselves when we make a mistake. And if something doesn’t go our way? We encourage ourselves, rather than blame. #comparison #mentalhealthresources #selfacceptance

Life can be challenging. If you or someone you care about is struggling, know that help is available 24 hours a day. 📲 Call or text 988 today. Visit http://spr.ly/6040m2JdY #nationalsuicidepreventionmonth #988 #helpishere

Everybody knows what a physical boundary is. Maybe it’s that row of trees you’ve planted between your house and your neighbor’s or the lines on a basketball court. Yet when it comes to your personal life, boundaries are often invisible. As a result, we may not fully understand what they are and why they’re so critical. 🚴 👉What are personal boundaries? “They’re the limits you define for yourself so you can maintain balance in your life,” says Tasha Holland-Kornegay, PhD. She’s based in North Carolina and is the founder of Wellness in Real Life. She’s also an author and a motivational speaker. 👉In the same way that a physical boundary protects your property, personal boundaries can protect you — your time, energy, ideas and values. “It’s about guarding your time for the parts of life that matter most to you, which includes essentials like resting and treating your body well,” says Holland-Kornegay. 👉It’s also about deciding what behavior you will and won’t tolerate from others. You learn how to value yourself as much as you value your friends, family and co-workers. #boundaries #personalboundaries #energy

A smooth start to your day can make everything else feel a little easier. But if you don’t stick to a consistent bedtime, you may have tougher mornings than usual. Build a routine 🍵 Even if you’re not a morning fan, you still have things to do. You may have kids that need breakfast made and lunches packed. Your dog still has to go out. None of that can happen without a morning routine. But it can be hard to start. Research shows that it can take 66 days to form a simple habit, such as eating fruit or taking a walk. And combining habits into a routine can take even longer. Love the light 🍵 Bright light therapy can lift your mood and make you more alert. When you raise the light a little at a time, you tell your brain that it’s time to get moving. Try these tips: Use a timer. Get a timer or use an alarm app that lights up slowly, just as the sun does. Eat breakfast by the window. Sit in the sunshine while you drink your coffee. Lower the lights at night. Mornings are hard when you haven’t slept well. For better sleep, dim the lights in the evening. And stay away from using electronic devices before bedtime. Move in the morning 🍵 Morning exercise can boost your mood and give you more energy. It raises your levels of BDNF (brain-derived neurotrophic factor). That’s a brain chemical that helps you learn new skills and stay sharp. If you feel foggy when you wake up, get moving to feel more alert. Some tips: Take a walk. A quick walk can lower your levels of cortisol, a chemical your body releases when you’re stressed. That’s a recipe for a better day. Plus, being outside gets you more light. Stroll around the block or take the dog for a morning walk. Try yoga. Yoga is a gentle way to wake up. Even doing yoga just times a week can lower anxiety, depression and stress, according to one study.5 No time for a class? Try an easy online video. Surround yourself with happiness 🍵 Try to fill your space with energy and joy in the morning. This can put you in a positive mindset for the day. Some strategies: Listen to upbeat music. Make a playlist of songs that make you happy. Then play it each morning. Use your music to keep you on track. For example, when the Beatles comes on, it’s time for your shower. Go easy on the news. It’s great to be well-informed. Bad news can put you in a bad mood. Sound familiar? Just tune in for the traffic and weather reports.

Practice positive self-talk ⭐ We all have an inner voice. It’s an endless stream of unspoken thoughts. This “self-talk” can be negative or positive. To see which way you lean, check in with yourself during the day. If you tend to be positive, keep it up. If you tend to judge yourself negatively, try to soften your approach. Talk to yourself in the same way you would talk to a dear friend. Show kindness, gentleness and encouragement. Reframe your negative thoughts ⭐ When you find yourself engaging in negative self-talk, pause. See if you can spin what you’re thinking in a positive way. Here are a couple of examples: If you’re thinking: “I don’t know what I’m doing, and I’ll probably fail.” Reframe it: Say to yourself, “This is a chance to learn something new.” If you’re thinking: “There’s no way I’ll get this job.” Reframe it: Say to yourself, “I have the skillset for this job.” Be curious ⭐ When you’re curious, you’re open to new experiences. You take an interest in those experiences. You also spend a lot of time asking questions, rather than mulling over negative thoughts. End each day with gratitude ⭐ Gratitude is being aware of and thankful for good things happening. And practicing gratitude helps you feel happier.6 Here’s a popular gratitude exercise. Before bed, simply think of three things you’re grateful for that day.

Practice positive self-talk ⭐ We all have an inner voice. It’s an endless stream of unspoken thoughts. This “self-talk” can be negative or positive. To see which way you lean, check in with yourself during the day. If you tend to be positive, keep it up. If you tend to judge yourself negatively, try to soften your approach. Talk to yourself in the same way you would talk to a dear friend. Show kindness, gentleness and encouragement. Reframe your negative thoughts ⭐ When you find yourself engaging in negative self-talk, pause. See if you can spin what you’re thinking in a positive way. Here are a couple of examples: If you’re thinking: “I don’t know what I’m doing, and I’ll probably fail.” Reframe it: Say to yourself, “This is a chance to learn something new.” If you’re thinking: “There’s no way I’ll get this job.” Reframe it: Say to yourself, “I have the skillset for this job.” Be curious ⭐ When you’re curious, you’re open to new experiences. You take an interest in those experiences. You also spend a lot of time asking questions, rather than mulling over negative thoughts. End each day with gratitude ⭐ Gratitude is being aware of and thankful for good things happening. And practicing gratitude helps you feel happier.6 Here’s a popular gratitude exercise. Before bed, simply think of three things you’re grateful for that day.

Practice positive self-talk ⭐ We all have an inner voice. It’s an endless stream of unspoken thoughts. This “self-talk” can be negative or positive. To see which way you lean, check in with yourself during the day. If you tend to be positive, keep it up. If you tend to judge yourself negatively, try to soften your approach. Talk to yourself in the same way you would talk to a dear friend. Show kindness, gentleness and encouragement. Reframe your negative thoughts ⭐ When you find yourself engaging in negative self-talk, pause. See if you can spin what you’re thinking in a positive way. Here are a couple of examples: If you’re thinking: “I don’t know what I’m doing, and I’ll probably fail.” Reframe it: Say to yourself, “This is a chance to learn something new.” If you’re thinking: “There’s no way I’ll get this job.” Reframe it: Say to yourself, “I have the skillset for this job.” Be curious ⭐ When you’re curious, you’re open to new experiences. You take an interest in those experiences. You also spend a lot of time asking questions, rather than mulling over negative thoughts. End each day with gratitude ⭐ Gratitude is being aware of and thankful for good things happening. And practicing gratitude helps you feel happier.6 Here’s a popular gratitude exercise. Before bed, simply think of three things you’re grateful for that day.

In recent times, there’s been a lot of talk and worry about anxiety. It remains one of the most common mental health concerns in the world. To be clear, anxiety can be very difficult to experience. And, in chronic form, it can be disruptive to your life and put your health at risk. 😮💨 But mild bouts of anxiety can actually help you. Those feelings of fear, worry and unease arise to tell you something important about your immediate circumstances. They can help sharpen your awareness, intensify your focus and spur you into action. When you feel anxious, your body reacts to a perceived threat or danger by going into “fight or flight” response. As part of this response, it releases hormones to speed your heart rate and breathing, increase your blood pressure and tense your muscles. These temporary physical reactions essentially heighten your ability to flee faster or fight stronger. (Though, in some cases, you may freeze instead, which in some scenarios, can be the best way to protect yourself.) This survival instinct is hardwired into us. In modern times, these anxious feelings tend to be more about a mental and emotional concern than about a physical threat. These feelings usually are triggering you to adapt to a situation, make a decision or resolve a problem. For example: Maybe you’re worried about an upcoming deadline or test, so you work or study harder to be prepared. Maybe you’re nervous about a first date with someone you’re really excited to meet, so you focus more on making a good impression. Maybe you’re trying to get around an unfamiliar neighborhood, so you’re more alert to your surroundings. If your strong feelings persist and are becoming harder to manage, consult with a medical or mental health professional. Anxiety disorders are treatable.

Being active is a key way to help you stay healthy at any age. As you get older, whether you’re 40, 50, 60 or older, it’s especially important. The better you move, the more you can get out there and do the things you love to do. 💪 Exercise #1: Yoga or chair yoga Exercise #2: Tai chi Exercise #3: Single-leg balance exercises Exercise #4: Standing back leg raise Exercise #5: Walking Exercise #6: Step-ups Exercise #7: Push-ups or wall push-ups Bottom line: Getting older doesn’t mean parking yourself on a couch more hours of the day. In fact, it’s even more important to stay active. What better time to get moving than in the summer? ☀️☀️

5 tools to add to your flight-anxiety toolkit ✈️✈️✈️ 1. Zero in on what makes you anxious 🧳 Not everyone’s flight anxiety is fueled by the same thing. Common fears include: Feeling a lack of control The plane crashing Exposure to germs in a confined space Feeling claustrophobic or being “trapped in the sky” Takeoffs Landings Turbulence 2. Educate yourself as much as you can 🧳 Knowledge is power. It can help you gain control over your flight anxiety. For example, let’s say your anxiety stems from a fear of the plane crashing. In this case, safety information may help you feel a bit better. 3. Focus on what you can control 🧳 This can help prevent other stressors from aggravating your anxiety. I find that the following can help: Know your flight details Research airport dining and entertainment options before you arrive. That way you can stay distracted and busy before you depart. Avoid caffeine and alcohol if they worsen your anxiety Arrive at the airport early. Most airlines recommend arriving 2 hours early for a domestic flight and 3 hours early for an international one. 4. Leverage CBT 🧳 For example, picture yourself completing your trip from the safety of your home. Imagine yourself packing. See yourself driving to the airport. Then arriving at the airport. You get the idea. The key is to picture it before you actually do it. Visualizing the experience, imagining potential outcomes, and calming yourself through it can be done by yourself. Or you can role-play with a friend. It’s a simple practice that can help the real thing feel more manageable and less stressful. 5. Distract yourself 🧳 Getting sucked into a great movie or book can be the perfect escape from flight anxiety. And the airlines help deliver here, with most flights offering personal screens with an array of entertainment options. Some airlines even let you browse options before you board. Uninterested in what’s offered? Watch or listen to whatever you prefer on your device. Just be sure to download it for offline access. SOURCES: Oakes, M., & Bor, R. (2010). The psychology of fear of flying (part I): a critical evaluation of current perspectives on the nature, prevalence and etiology of fear of flying. Travel medicine and infectious disease, 8(6), 327–338. http://spr.ly/6048YmAfg