Cutting Ties to Family and Friends in the Name of Kiruv

  While some rabbis claim that they would never influence ba'alei teshuva/newly religious to sever familial ties, Sephardi Chief Rabbi of Israel Yitzhak Yosef believes in just the opposite approach. Earlier this week, Ynetnews reported that Yosef "has called for religious Jews to distance their children from secular or merely traditionally Jewish family members, and even to prevent their children from meeting them."1 The Chief Rabbi stated "There are ba'alei tshuva (once-secular Jews who have become observant) with non-religious families who take their small, 7-year-old, 8-year-old children to visit [non-religious family], and this influences the children."2 His concern is that secular influences such as TV and interaction with non-orthodox family will ultimately pave the way for kids to leave orthodoxy.
  The rabbi's words were countered by Rabbi Refael "Rafi" Feuerstein, the co-chairman of the rabbinical organization Tzohar, [who] criticized the chief rabbi's approach and said, "The fruits of a disconnected and anxious education are that we treat the secular public with arrogance and contempt . . .  and only increases polarization and hatred in people."3
  Adding to the difficulty of changing one's life to become orthodox, the Chief Rabbi now wants BTs (ba'alei teshuva) to cause more strife and anger within their families. Bad enough that BTs have already informed their families that they cannot eat on their dishes or drive to them on the holidays, that they will not see them or take their calls over Shabbat, that they've given up many activities that they previously enjoyed with extended family, that their lifestyle is hugely different from that of their parents, and that they've taken on a strict interpretation of Jewish practice, they now are expected to sever bonds with their non-orthodox family to ensure their children's spiritual safety.
  In Margery I. Schwartz's book "What's Up with the Hard Core Jewish People? An Irreverent Yet Informative Approach to Judaism and Religious Devotion From A Reform Jewish Mother's Perspective" she talks about Aish HaTorah's grip on her son and how the yeshiva

encourage[s] students to reject their upbringing if it's not according to Torah. They believe that they are reprogramming our children in the proper path. Aish doesn't focus on the fact that a person from a non-Orthodox background most often cannot be integrated into the ultra-orthodox world without destroying old friendships and family connections.4

  While some readers might be thinking that Rabbi Yitzhak Yosef's words and even those of Margery Schwartz are inaccurate and that kiruv rabbis do not promote or justify severing ties with non-orthodox family, it only takes a Google search to find various blog posts suggesting just the opposite. Even Chabad Rabbi Tzvi Freeman's addresses a reader's question asking why a close long-term friendship suddenly collapsed as one of the friends became increasingly orthodox. Freeman states:

Many of us have been through this. You fall in love with a different way of living, rituals, study -- a whole new wave of life washes over you -- and your only way to deal with it is by blocking out the rest of the world. I've seen it happen not only to people getting into their Judaism, but with musicians, artists, career people, politicians. Although, yes, religion may be the most encompassing of all.

It's a sign of an earnest personality, someone who puts his all into anything he does. You can't achieve a total immersion into anything without first letting go of everything else. Perhaps it was that same earnestness that allowed such a strong bond between the two of you in younger years. This is a person who, wherever he is, all of him is there.5

  Freeman blames the BT's personality for alienating his friend and assumes it's because he is, perhaps, very earnest. He says it's the same thing that any person who is passionate about something might do. But Freeman does admit that this alienation may be more extreme when it comes from religion. The one thing that Freeman doesn't address is whether people becoming orthodox are being influenced, either subtly or overtly, to sever relationships that kiruv professionals and their organizations may feel are, in some way, not kosher.
  When we look back at Sephardi Chief Rabbi of Israel Yitzhak Yosef's concern about being influenced by those who aren't orthodox, it seems like his ideas aren't so shocking. They're just the same extremist views that other kiruv organizations hold. The only difference is that he seems to have no problem saying them out loud.
1. Nachshoni, Kobi. Chief Rabbi: Keep children away from secular family. Ynetnews. March 13, 2016.
2. Ibid.
3. Ibid.
4.  Schwartz, Margery I. What's Up with the Hard Core Jewish People? An Irreverent Yet Informative Approach to Judaism and Religious Devotion From A Reform Jewish Mother's Perspective. US. 2006. p. 18.
5. Freeman, Tzvi. My Orthodox Friend Cut Me Off! Chabad.org.

Why in the World Is Chabad at Muhlenberg College?

  Muhlenberg College is a small liberal arts college in Allentown, Pennsylvania, embodying the Lutheran ideals of its namesake, Henry Melchior Muhlenberg, the founder of the Lutheran Church in America. The school promotes intellectual curiosity and growth, creativity, and an ethical responsibility to humankind the world over. The school boasts a small student to faculty ratio with over a hundred clubs and organizations--including a campus Hillel that addresses the needs of an array of Jewish students who make up 33% of the student body. So why is Chabad--a well-known utlra-orthodox kiruv/outreach group--attempting to establish roots on this small private college's campus? It looks like the college newspaper wants to know the same.
  According to The Muhlenberg Weekly's article Analyzing Chabad's Role on Campus: New Option Geared for Jewish Students Proves Controversial, Chabad first appeared on campus this school year  and the reaction has been mixed.

“Many students have shared with me that they feel sad that, with the arrival of Chabad, they see the shifts in what had been a unified Jewish community,” said Rabbi Simon, and added that students have also shared that Chabad’s proximity to the campus “has been really divisive.”
Aaron Brandt ‘17, the president of Muhlenberg College Hillel and a former attendee of an Orthodox day school, agrees, and offered a potential explanation for the divisiveness. “Chabad has been attempting to attract students who are already active members of the Hillel community, rather than students who have not yet found their place in Jewish life since coming to college.”1

  Chabad's modus operandi is to send shluchim, or missionaries, to set up outposts on college campuses, and in towns and cities all over the globe in order to attract Jews to greater Jewish observance. The group is decidedly not pluralistic, and teaches Judaism solely from an orthodox perspective. They do not recognize non-orthodox denominations as legitimate, and the late rebbe Menachem Schneerson--the last Lubavitcher rebbe, had stated in a letter that "My considered opinion . . . is [that] the doctrines and ideology of the Conservative and Reform movements can only be classed in the category of heretical movements which have plagued our people at one time or another, only to disappear again, having no basis in our everlasting Torah."2

Rebbe Schneerson: Other expressions of Judaism are heretical.
Click to enlarge.

  In the handbook for Chabad emissaries, Shlichus: Meeting the Outreach Challenge, Rabbi Eliyahu Cohen gives advice to campus missionaries in his article "The Campus Approach." In addition to addressing the point that existing Jewish groups such as Hillel may have issues with Chabad trying to establish themselves on campus, Cohen urges missionaries to "become a resource for questions on Jewish life"3 and provides information on how to appeal to college students for maximum impact. He stresses the importance of becoming a chartered club and states that:

Apart from providing the organization with legitimacy, [a charter] may also provide privileges such as access to campus rooms, media equipment and reduced rates in the school newspaper. In private colleges where issues of church and state do not come into play, financial aid may be offered. Ask administrators about including a flyer with the registration, housing or dining information sent to the student's home. It may be appropriate to ask parents to enroll their children as members of Chabad House for $10 or $18 a year.4

  Setting up outposts on college campuses provides Chabad missionaries with the perfect environment in which to proselytize. Not only is there a sizable and changing Jewish student population that they can groom for present or future observance and/or yeshiva study, but there are campus resources which can be harnessed to further their agenda, as well as students and parents who will serve as a source of funding--sometimes long past graduation. Chabad isn't innocently coming to Muhlenberg College to provide something that's missing from Hillel's diverse offerings--unless you consider indoctrination to be innocent.

For more about Chabad on this blog: and use the Search this Blog function for more:
Is Chabad Ultra-Orthodox?
Chabad's Double Standard: Outrage Over Being Duped
Who *are* the People in Chabad.org's Fundraising Letter?
What BuzzFeed Forgot to Tell You About the Lubavitcher Rebbe and Chabad
Use the Search This Blog function to find more.

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1. Kantor, Gregory. Analyzing Chabad's Role on Campus: New Option Geared for Jewish Students Proves Controversial. The Mulhlenberg Weekly. March 3, 2016.
2. Schneerson, Menachem M. The Conservative and Reform Ideology. Correspondence by Rabbi Menachen M. Schneerson, The Lubavitcher Rebbe. July 21, 1959. qtd. on Chabad.org.
3. Cohen, Rabbi Eliyahu. "The Campus Approach."Shlichus: Meeting the Outreach Challenge. Nshei Ubnos Chabad, 1991. p117. 
4. ibid.

Chabad's Kiruv Double Standard: Outrage Over Being "Duped"

     By now you've probably heard about Baci Weiler, the University of Chicago student who was mistaken for a male by a Chabad kiruv worker who then went on to help her don tefillin. If you haven't, feel free to read the story here. Orthodox Jews consider the wearing of tefillin to be a male-only mitzvah, (commandment) despite stories that the daughters of Rashi, a well-known biblical commentator from the Middle ages, wore the little black boxes.
     As expected, much of the orthodox community--especially the Chabad community--is outraged  that an unsuspecting yeshiva bocher (student) was "duped" into believing that Ms. Weiler was a guy based on her haircut and clothing. It is the responsibility of the Chabad missionary to make sure he's practicing what he believes in the correct manner. It isn't the responsibility of the person he approaches to rebuke him, because many times, that random person on the street might not know the minutiae of Jewish law--or that there even is a law.
     As it turns out, Baci Weiler does wear tefillin on a regular basis, and obviously has no issue with egalitarian Judaism. And yet, many Chabadniks--the very people who publicly preach about loving all Jews, who often refer to the Lubavitcher Rebbe's belief that all Jews are like one body and each Jew is important, had no problem blaming Baci Weiler for "taking advantage" of this kiruv worker.
     Now, to be clear, I don't blame anyone. I don't believe that there was any wrongdoing in this situation. If anything, there was a misunderstanding. He offered, she accepted, she wore it, it was good. She posted a picture on social media, it got around. Now, many in the Chabad community are showing their true colors and rather than seeing the good (nothing bad happened, this woman's Judaism was inspired, maybe others might be inspired,) many are choosing to denigrate Baci Weiler. You know, blame the woman, the evil temptress who led the man astray--you know, the typical witch hunt accusations that have been tossed around throughout human history. But this isn't about feminism, right?
     I've provided a few screen shots of some of the comments from Collive.com, a Chabad community news site. There are some comments that genuinely reflect modern, progressive, and mainstream views. There are more that represent a community mired in both fear and ignorance of gender equality, feminist issues, and progressive thought. There are some people who feel bad for the yeshiva student. (Click pictures to enlarge.)

Click individual frames to enlarge.
From Collive.com.1

Click to enlarge photo.2

     The above are some examples of what people in Chabad are saying online. Baci Weiler did write an explanation on her public Facebook page, and I'm including that as well. Towards the end, she states:

On another level, and more importantly, the photo is powerful because it depicts an instance of accidental pluralism and of shared joy in the mitzvah of hanachat tefillin. It is a serendipitous glimpse of the world I wish I lived in: a world where both he, a bearded chabadnik guy, and I, a buzz-cut egalitarian girl, could be “frum”, regardless of gender or labels, equally bound by mitzvot.2

Baci's response sums up so many issues inherent in ultra-orthodox Jewish outreach.
     Within kiruv, there is a constant and deliberate white-washing of women's roles within the ultra-orthodox community. During the kiruv process, women are pushed into the community's rigid gender roles while receiving nice, stock answers about why women do certain things and not others, all while pushing them away from egalitarian thought and practice.
     Within kiruv, all are accepted as Jews, but Chabad (and other ultra-orthodox groups) do not recognize Reform, Conservative, and other liberal forms of Judaism as legitimate expressions of Judaism. The only pluralism that exists is the "accidental pluralism" that Baci Weiler experienced. Chabad writer Shalom Paltiel claims that "the problem is the labels" and asks:

Why can't we all just be "Jewish"? Why the need to label ourselves based on our level of observance?

It's true some of us are more religiously observant than others. Is that reason to categorically divide us into splintering groups? Let us each observe Judaism and its precepts to the best of our knowledge and ability, without the need of a name tag proclaiming ourselves a particular brand.
In addition to dividing us, the labels also limit our growth as Jews. Once we've been labeled, we no longer feel the need to learn more about our heritage than is typical for members of our particular group. Remove the label, and Judaism is yours to explore, completely and freely, without fear you might cross the line and observe some tradition that's not for your type.3

Click to enlarge.4

Sounds great in theory, and yet, there is no true freedom in a Judaism (or any religion, culture, community, etc.) divided by prescribed community gender norms and expectations.
In a letter from the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Menachem Schneerson, dated July 21, 1959, it's quite clear that Chabad's official stance is that anything other than orthodox Judaism is heretical. To explain Paltiel's question regarding why we all can't "just be Jewish," it needs to be understood that according to Chabad doctrine, if you are born of a Jewish mother, you are Jewish, but your liberal denomination is not Judaism. Paltiel, Schneerson, the Chabad commenters, and many ultra-orthodox Jews do not recognize other forms of Jewish expression as Judaism, but rather, as heresy. Sure, they'll reach out to you and tell you that "we're all Jews" without a second thought as to the duplicitous nature of their own actions when they want a donation, or when they want to nudge you towards greater observance. What is being left out of all kiruv, is that these outreach organizations--including Chabad--don't, and won't, consider non-orthodox Judaism as legitimate.
     There exists a double standard within the Chabad community. Chabad missionaries deceive by intentionally withholding information in order to do kiruv, yet many in Chabad (and other orthodox communities) feel that Baci Weiler's choice to not reveal her gender was what was truly deceitful. Knowing what the Lubavitcher Rebbe preached, and knowing what his followers believe, I can only hope that those who are so outraged by Baci Weiler allowing this Chabad bochur to put tefillin on her, will take a good look in the mirror and realize that this is minor compared to the deception that they are perpetrating daily through the willful suppression of information that might change the minds and actions of the non-orthodox Jews that Chabad approaches.


Works Cited
1. Rabbi Calls Out Liberal Hypocrite. Collive. June 23, 2015
2. Weiler, Baci. Facebook post. June 23, 2015.
3. Paltiel, Shalom. Labels are for Suits. Chabad.org.
4. Schneerson, Menachem M. The Conservative and Reform Ideology. Correspondence by Rabbi Menachen M. Schneerson, The Lubavitcher Rebbe. July 21, 1959. qtd. on Chabad.org.
.

What BuzzFeed Forgot to Tell You About The Lubavitcher Rebbe and Chabad

     On June 19, 2015, BuzzFeed posted an article entitled "11 Ways the Lubavitcher Rebbe Forever Changed the World" in honor of the twenty-first anniversary of the death of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Menachem Mendel Schneerson. It was a very lovely tribute to the man who headed Chabad and still inspires people all over the world to explore orthodox Judaism. I figured I'd quickly add a bit of information that's missing.

     What BuzzFeed lists: "Judaism in the public thoroughfare." They cite the ubiquitous Chabad menorahs as further proof that Judaism is now very public. 
     What BuzzFeed leaves out: The truth is, Chabad is everywhere, and the same way people don't necessarily want missionaries approaching them, is the same way they may not want Chabad shluchim (emissaries) approaching them. Add a dose of Jewish guilt to the mix and the next thing you know, you're eating cholent and singing Shabbos zmiros. (That's a joke, I think.) A New York Times article about the Rebbe states:

[The Rebbe] tried to reach [non-orthodox Jews] through broad public campaigns that included, in addition to the mitzvah tanks, full-page newspaper advertisements announcing the time that candles should be kindled to welcome the Sabbath.

While some passers-by accepted the invitation to put on tefillin -- black leather straps and boxes containing verses from the Scripture and worn by the faithful during prayer -- the "Are you Jewish" question rubbed others the wrong way; many thought religion too private to discuss with strangers on street corners.1 

     What BuzzFeed lists: "Speak to the youth." The article goes on to say "instead of viewing children as merely unfinished adults, the Rebbe viewed the vigor, openness, and pursuit of truth among youth as a unique advantage they could teach and inspire world-weary adults. In the same vein, the Rebbe would dedicate special talks to children, engaging with their minds and hearts with the deepest secrets of the Torah."2
     What BuzzFeed leaves out: The Rebbe was a firm believer in "reaching the parent through the child, beginning Torah education early."3 Chabad's handbook for shluchim discusses education for children and the importance of beginning early. It states:

Chabad's Mommy and Me programs are places where mothers and children are invited to meetings where innocuous topics as childcare and health are discussed. The children are busy with arts and crafts. Mitzvos and Judaism are introduced after a few sessions. . . . Mommy and Me . . . serves as an exceptional tool to . . . involve them with other Chabad activities.4

Chabad tells people working with non-orthodox parents who were convinced to put their children in a Chabad-directed school:

     In order to be successful in involving and bringing families closer to Yiddishkeit, we, the administrators and teachers, need to establish warm and positive personal relationships with individual families. They then feel comfortable with us, trust us and want to work with us.
     Once parents feel that we do, indeed, care about them on a personal level, they will then be more inclined to become involved with the school's programs. With friendly encouragement they will begin to make personal commitments to mitzvos as well. The more exposure and contact we have with the families the closer they will become. 5

     Without going into a tirade about campus kiruv, a New York Times article about the Rebbe mentions that "one Reform group attacked him for luring non-Orthodox children to Hasidic lives in which they rejected the values of their parents."6

     What BuzzFeed lists: "Rebellion is Revelation" and states:

The Rebbe’s approach declared, “Finally the iceberg of America is beginning to melt! Finally, its young people are demonstrating that conformity is not the sum of life’s goals! They have smashed the idols of false progress — they need now only be led back to the living waters of their heritage.7

     What BuzzFeed leaves out: While refusing to conform to the norms of the secular world may be seen and celebrated in a positive light, try telling a person living in the Chabad world that they don't need to conform to the standards of their ultra-orthodox community and see what they say. Both women and men who wish to leave Chabad and orthodoxy struggle to retain custody of their children. Women often struggle to obtain a proper get (Jewish divorce) from their husbands. Families often completely shun their grown children who refuse to conform and opt out of orthodoxy. A double standard exists in this world: if you refuse to conform to the secular and/or non-orthodox worlds, you are celebrated. If you refuse to conform to Chabad's strict orthodoxy--which is not the same happy-go-lucky orthodoxy sold to you at the Shabbos table--you are rejected.

      What BuzzFeed lists: "The Power of the Feminine Soul" stating that:

When the world struggled with including women within the rubric of Jewish tradition, the Rebbe had already long empowered women to be leaders and thinkers, masters of Jewish future and bringers of light in the world.8

     What BuzzFeed leaves out: While this sounds nice on paper, this is specifically about Judaism, and not the world at large. This also neglects to mention that women must follow certain gender-based laws within Judaism, as interpreted by the Lubavitch movement. Women are still bound by the same laws of orthodoxy as all orthodox women. For example, women must follow the Rebbe's orders that they cover their hair specifically (and are often chastised by other women if they don't,) women are told how to dress, and young girls are groomed from the time they are in school on how to be a proper daughter of Israel--according to Chabad's teachings. Women's issues are sugar-coated by apologists who still bow to the religious patriarchy which still enforces many antiquated beliefs.

     What BuzzFeed lists: "No person is far gone." Chabad is famous for the outreach work they do to Jews in prison. The article states "even someone imprisoned for crimes committed, could not be overlooked or ignored and can and should be rehabilitated and activated for good."9
     What BuzzFeed leaves out: While the Rebbe may have been a great guy for bringing Judaism to the tinok shenishba (Jews who aren't religious due to ignorance) in prison, believing that he/she can be spiritually reformed, the same belief isn't always held for those believed to be heretics and apostates. Heretics and apostates are often excommunicated, cast out from both family and community, sometimes out of fear that they will have a negative influence on others in the community. In a nutshell: criminals--not far gone, people leaving Chabad and orthodoxy--far gone.

     What BuzzFeed lists: "Joy." The article states "Judaism deserved not to be mourned and eulogized, but to be celebrated."10
     What BuzzFeed leaves out: Even in living Judaism with joy, it is still orthodox-centric. Mixed dancing is prohibited, men are not allowed to listen to women sing, and all joyous activities must still follow orthodox guidelines. As for Judaism being celebrated, I do wonder about the balance of joy. While there are some families where fathers are taking a more active role in childcare and home-related chores, I know that there are many that aren't, or that traditionally haven't, and while men are out farbrenging (a farbrengen is a joyous Chasidic celebration,) the women are often at home, caring for children.

     What BuzzFeed lists: "Always Practical." The Rebbe wanted people to do mitzvot (commandments,) often translated as "good deeds." He felt that it was more important to do something--no matter how simple, rather than nothing.
     What BuzzFeed leaves out: The motivation is that every mitzvah/deed that a person does brings Moshiach (the messiah) and redemption closer. Getting non-orthodox Jews to help Chabadniks score points by agreeing to put on tefillin (phylacteries) or make a blessing on an apple and honey for Rosh Hashanah may seem innocuous, but understand why these things are being pushed.

     What BuzzFeed lists: "We are All One Community." The article states "as the Rebbe told then New York Mayor David Dinkins, “We are one side. We are one people, living in one city, under one administration and under one G-d.”11
     What BuzzFeed leaves out: The Rebbe may have felt that "we are one people" but I have to wonder when there is infighting between sects, the infighting within sects, hateful and condescending comments often made about the Conservative, Reform, and other liberal denominations, racism, and the shameful elitism often found in online Chabad forums.



     What BuzzFeed lists: "Harness Technology."

The Rebbe . . . considered [technology] a valuable component to achieving greater good.
Using the latest means of communication, the Rebbe encouraged that radio in the 1950s, satellite in the 1980s and Internet in the early 1990s all be used to promulgate knowledge and education. When technology was harnessed properly, he taught, it not only was not a negative, but itself a portent G-dliness[sic] and goodness in the world.12

     What BuzzFeed leaves out: Technology is a very important tool in Chabad's method of kiruv. They have a huge, active website, and each Chabad House around the world appears to have a website that is linked to the main site. Their program calendars are listed, as are the services that they offer. Chabad also uses technology to keep in touch with their shluchim (emissaries) who often live far from their families, friends, and communities. Children of shluchim often use the internet as an educational tool. It's not that the Rebbe is telling you to spend your days and nights on Facebook, but rather that technology can be used to their benefit in furthering their own outreach goals.

     What BuzzFeed lists: "Think Global." This brief section is simply about the thousands of kiruv workers sent to live and work all over the world, in order to missionize non-orthodox Jews.
     What BuzzFeed leaves out: This isn't quite the same global thinking that environmentalists have in mind.

     What BuzzFeed lists: "Act local." The article mentions that "emissaries are largely funded locally, forming a holistic part of the local community."13
     What BuzzFeed leaves out: Actions cannot take place without funding. While Chabad programs are often highly subsidized with a suggested donation and a pay what you can/we won't turn you away attitude, the truth is, shluchim often live on community donations and receive very little funding from the main Chabad offices, and usually only during the first year. This is one of the reasons why Chabad trains future kiruv workers in the fine art of fundraising. And yes, they're pretty good at it.

Works Cited
1. Goldman, Ari L. Rabbi Schneerson Led A Small Hasidic Sect To World Prominence. The New York Times. June 13, 1994.
2. BuzzFeed Community Member "Mordechail." 11 Ways the Lubavitcher Rebbe Forever Changed the World. BuzzFeed.com. June, 19, 2015.
3. Plotkin, Goldie, qtd. in Shlichus: Meeting the Outreach Challenge. Nshei Ubnos Chabad, 1991. p76.
4. Lerner, Nettie, qtd. in Shlichus: Meeting the Outreach Challenge. Nshei Ubnos Chabad, 1991. pp. 75-6.
5. Fajnland, Ronya, qtd. in Shlichus Outreach Insights. Nshei Chabad Publications. 1996. p.69.
6. Goldman, Ari L. Rabbi Schneerson Led A Small Hasidic Sect To World Prominence. The New York Times. June 13, 1994.
7. BuzzFeed Community Member "Mordechail." 11 Ways the Lubavitcher Rebbe Forever Changed the World. BuzzFeed.com. June, 19, 2015.
8. ibid.
9. ibid.
10. ibid.
11. ibid.
12. ibid.
13. ibid.

Call of the Shofar, Brainwashing, and Kiruv

     I just read "Confessions of a Shofar Staffer," written by Chabad member Shmuel Pollen, in which he discusses his experiences at the Call of the Shofar retreat. For those of us who believe that there is such a thing as deceptive kiruv, the similarities in Mr. Pollen's revelations are very similar to those experienced by people who look critically at Jewish outreach. If you were to switch the organizations from Call of the Shofar to any of the Big Kiruv organizations, you'll be able to see how Mr. Pollen may have experienced the very thing that many of us have been decrying for a while now. I am posting excerpts, but feel free to click the link in the first sentence to read the article in its entirety.

It suddenly occurred to me that this organization which seemed benign and elevating, was actually, a threat to our very souls.

How so?

Let me begin with the allegation that people who went to Shofar have been brainwashed. I dismissed this when I heard it. It seemed ridiculous to me. Then I thought to myself: If someone actually is brainwashed, how would he know? Wouldn't the brainwashing itself dictate to your brain that you're in line with reality? Wouldn't it convince you that what you believe now is even more real because you're "enlightened"? And wouldn't it dictate that anyone who says you're brainwashed just "doesn't understand?"

I came to the conclusion after some serious introspection that I actually was brainwashed, assuming the definition of brainwashing is being manipulated to believe something you otherwise would not have. It's possible for someone to brainwash another, while the brainwasher doesn't think that that's what he's doing. He may himself be brainwashed to believe that his work is holy. I believe that to be the case here.

     This is very interesting. Pollen's statement about brainwashing allows for the idea that those who are brainwashing others may be brainwashed himself, and doesn't even realize that is what he is doing. Yet, this is the very thing that kiruv workers scream that they are not doing. So I ask, is it possible that outreach workers do the same thing without even realizing it? If a Chabad member can suggest that Call of the Shofar people are doing it, it becomes impossible to argue that any outreach professional isn't engaging in the same brainwashing.

"That's a monumental change to our entire life's purpose -- in three days, mind you. How could we have given license to a man we know nothing about, to redefine our life's purpose?"

But isn't this what Chabad and other Jewish outreach groups attempt to do when they take students on weekend or week-long "retreats" and/or trips to far-off locales in order to "redefine [their] life's purpose?"

And now let's address the "experience". The great "feeling of closeness to G-d and to each other." This was the one I always continued to believe in. But when I started thinking about this differently, I started to wonder.

What did we actually feel there? Was it holiness? Was it G-d? Was it the soul?

      The above lines are very interesting. I've often wondered about those Israel experiences many of us have had. You know, those run by kiruv organizations that leave us with the same exact feeling of closeness to those around us and to what we are led to believe is "God." But let's face it. These experiences are contrived in order to convince us that we are feeling these things. Our feelings may be real, but are they based on reality? Or are they based on a mind-trip the leader of such an experience is taking us on?

According to the video Captive Minds that Rabbi She Hecht mentioned, it would appear otherwise. The suggestibility tactics used at Shofar are used at all kinds of vicious cults to create a euphoric experience.

Afterwards, the cult leader tells them that what you felt was G-d. That's what you got here: G-d. Only here. People who tell you to leave here? That's Satan trying to keep you from G-d.

    Wait a second. "Suggestibility tactics?" Being told that you are feeling God? The idea that anything holding a person back from observance is a manifestation of "the Satan?" This all sounds vaguely familiar.
     Upon further reading of the article, I saw that the leader of this Shofar program allegedly has Landmark Education credentials. I've known about Landmark for about twenty years, and I've known people who've gone through their programs and have appeared to become very changed after their experiences. I stand by those who deem Landmark a cult. But this post isn't about Landmark. To people involved in Landmark Education, it is not a cult. They may not see that there are cult tactics in use.
     Pollen laments:

That's a monumental change to our entire life's purpose -- in three days, mind you. How could we have given license to a man we know nothing about, to redefine our life's purpose?

And yet, doesn't this same thing happen in kiruv? How is this not the same? Mr. Pollen further states that:

We were sold a mind-game and told it's G-d, and now we believe this workshop is the best way to get close to Him (Sounds a bit like the definition of avoda zara, come to think of it).

     Again, I ask, isn't that what the different kiruv organizations do? They sell unsuspecting young people a bill of goods, in which they convince potential recruits that by doing what the kiruv professional (and his/her organization) says, they will be able to get close to God. What makes this any different from what Mr. Pollen has experienced? But then, Mr. Pollen says this, which convinces me that maybe he really doesn't see the parallels:

Every baal tshuva knows that happiness through freedom from rules leads only to misery. They found more happiness in living a Torah lifestyle made even more meaningful by its rules. 

How could we have allowed someone we barely know to make us forget this fundamental truth of why we're here in this world?Could it be we were in too much a state of suggestibility to notice what was wrong here? Doesn't that sound like brainwashing at a very deep level of your belief system?

     In this case, I think that it's easy to see that Mr. Pollen is upset to see so many of his brethren manipulated, yet, as he stated much earlier on, very often those doing the brainwashing may not realize they are brainwashing others, nor realize that they may be brainwashed themselves. He complains of this "brainwashing at a very deep level of your belief system." Perhaps it's a bit like recruiting non-orthodox students and challenging their beliefs with well-rehearsed arguments meant to awe and convince, and meant to leave them without a proper way to argue back.
     I don't expect that anyone in kiruv or in the orthodox world will agree with these comparisons. But they don't need to agree. But in this case, it sounds like many of us feel the same way: we don't want organizations attempting to use the very same techniques on our children or on us. We want the same respect that Mr. Pollen wants. We don't want to be unknowingly brainwashed by those who may not even know they're doing such things to us. Above all, the same legitimate feelings of having been spiritually violated that Mr. Pollen has experienced, are the same legitimate feelings that many of us who oppose deceptive kiruv have experienced.

Update: This post also appears as a link on The Cult News Network at http://www.cultnews.net/Scroll down to January 1, 2014 "Call of the Shofar, Brainwashing, and Kiruv."


 All quoted material from:
Pollen, Shmuel. Confessions of a 'Shofar' Staffer. ColLive. December 31, 2013.

Who *ARE* These People in Chabad.org's Fundraising Letter?

     I received this email in my inbox the other day. Chabad is known the world over as masters at fundraising, and I mean that as a huge compliment--and as a huge fact. Shluchim (missionaries) learn both on the "job" and in classes, as well as through in-house literature, how to effectively solicit donations for their programming. Fundraising can be done in a multitude of ways. In this case, I'm sharing an email, recently sent out to those on the Chabad.org list. While I do receive several of these per year, I wanted to share this particular one. I've taken the liberty of underlining certain lines in red and green.

   "...Chabad.org is often the deciding factor in the life of a troubled teenager, a lonely college student, or a "regular" family in some forlorn corner of the world with no Jewish community or friends."

     I'd like to know what the decision is that these people are trying to make. What are they deciding between? I'd also like to point out that Chabad emissaries don't only set up camp in "some forlorn corner of the world with no Jewish community." If you look around the New York/New Jersey/Connecticut tri-state area, you'll find many existing Jewish communities with Reform and Conservative populations into which Chabad emissaries have inserted themselves and set up Chabad centers. While they may say that they are not in competition with local synagogues, it is my opinion that this assertion is not entirely true. Through fundraising, they are able to greatly offset the cost of things like Hebrew School, holiday and shabbat services, and social programming, thus enabling them to offer little or no-cost (Chabad-centric, nicely packaged orthodox) Judaism to local Jews. The problem here is that this hugely subsidized programming serves to compete with the more liberal synagogues in existence, thus compromising temple membership for the more liberal factions. So, while they may not be directly in competition, the competition still exists. (This is not taking into account competing holiday programs, Purim parties, Hanukah celebrations, etc. that may occur at the same time.)

     I am also curious about the "troubled teenager" they are trying to reach and how exactly my money is going to help this person. How is he/she troubled? If there is preexisting knowledge that someone is indeed "troubled" then I would think that there are some ethical issues to be considered. Are parents being contacted? What is being done?  And what's the story with this "lonely college student?" Will money be given to the college's Student Union to help fund a new campus club? (This is a good time to remember specifically that missionaries, regardless of affiliation, regularly prey on people who may be more vulnerable and searching for belonging and meaning.) Is Chabad telling us that money that goes to the Chabad.org website will magically change people's lives? And tell us more about the ""regular" family." Why is "regular" in quotes in the email? Is that code for ... secular? And if they're secular, why exactly is this a problem?

     Let's also address the other line I underlined.

"We must continue to share and innovate until every last Jew has the opportunity to learn about his or her heritage."

The use of the word "must" conveys a sense of urgency in reaching "every last Jew" in order to give them this opportunity. Donors are paying Chabad.org to help them find every last Jew. I believe it was in Sue Fishkoff's book The Rebbe’s Army: Inside the World of Chabad-Lubavitch (Schocken Books, 2003) in which we learn that Chabad missionaries new to an area will often use the phone book as a guide to locating local Jewish families. I guess that's part of the effort to make sure that "every last Jew has the opportunity to learn about his or her heritage."Chabad is known for their mitzvah tanks, their street-corner kiruv, and their more aggressive outreach efforts in attempting to reach people. It's no surprise that this is Chabad's modus operandi. They're good at what they do and they have many hands willing to do the work, research, article writing, and website maintenance to make sure they can approach "every last Jew."
     As a quick note, I know that for many people reading, none of this is a surprise. Some of you may have even received the same email. The reason I periodically post letters from outreach organizations is because I find the language to be very interesting when looked at critically. Most of us barely skim fundraising letters. But when we read into them, they really just leave a lot of questions unanswered.

Honesty: The Best Policy

     It was recently brought to my attention that this blog, Jewish Outreach: What Your Rabbi Isn't Telling You, is being discussed on Imamother,  a rather busy and diverse forum for orthodox women.  Imamother community users range from liberal Modern Orthodox to Far Right Charedi and everything in between, both Litvish and Hasidic, who come from a broad range of nationalities, and fall into a wide spectrum of ethnic identities. When I heard that my blog was reaching this group, I was both happy and concerned, unsure of how the views of this blog would be received. Given the extreme nature of the blog address ("stopkiruvnow" doesn't really make for easy alliances I've been told,) I was surprised to see that people even bothered to read any of the posts at all.
     But you know what I found?
     I found an intelligent, honest, four page discussion in response to my post "Aish HaTorah and Multilevel Marketing Scams." Many women, presumably of the orthodox world, agreed that kiruv is not always done responsibly. A few felt that it isn't right to try to make people religious, and someone stated that kiruv should not be done at all. Some felt that with so many other religions and cults existing, that Jewish outreach is doing what has to be done, e.g. using marketing tactics such as slick advertising, etc., in order to draw people in. One commenter expressed that

The reason the comparison [to multilevel marketing] is apt is because the MLM marketing hides the negative aspects of the product, and kiruv does also. You only find those out yourself after you have already paid the price. Then you resent the seller. I would have appreciated more honesty and transparency [in kiruv.]1

 She then listed some of the issues that are often withheld from those venturing into orthodoxy. What surprised me most was that there are people within the orthodox world who agree that dishonest and deceptive kiruv practices have to change.
     Blogger Shilton HaSechel posted his own rant against kiruv back in 2010 in which he stated:

Talking about manipulation, Kiruv Organizations should not be using marketing strategies. Sure if you're selling a vacuum it's bad marketing to mention that it's gonna die a day or so after the warranty - but this is something worse than a vacuum these are PEOPLE's lives. What do I mean by marketing strategy? Well, if a a non-frum girl goes and ask an Aish Hatorah guy what the status of woman is in Judaism he's not gonna whip out those delightfully backwards Gemarot which say tons of sexist things. Nope! Not even going to mention that a woman is considered in the Gemara too "crafty" to learn Torah, and too unreliable to be a witness. Kiruv Organizations sugar coat all the rough bits of Judaism and shelter their adherents from them until waaaay too late. THAT is pure manipulation - taking advantage of someone's ignorance about Judaism in order to only present the "fun" bits.

Be honest! I want every Kiruv Organization to be HONEST. If someones ask the Rabbi "Hey Rabbi what does the Gemara say about non-Jews" I want the Rabbi to say first "It thinks they're a bunch of donkeys with the emissions of horses" and only THEN make the excuses. I want the Rabbi to read all the demonology bits and read some choice Biblical passages about stoning and genocide. Go ahead! Present all the nice bits too BUT make sure to honestly present the good and the bad EQUALLY. If you lose "souls" 'cuz of you're brutal honesty then at least you know you're not lying to people. 2

Early on in his post, he feels the need to impress upon his readers that he is not against orthodoxy. I feel the same way, but unfortunately what seems to be the norm is the idea that if a person looks at aspects of Judaism or orthodoxy critically, that he/she is anti-Semitic, a self-hating Jew, or anti-Orthodox. While I cannot speak for everyone, I can speak for myself. I don't "hate" orthodoxy, nor do I hate Jews, and I actually kind of like myself. It's the deception that is used--not all of the time, and not by everyone--to pull people into a lifestyle that they otherwise might not have chosen on their own, that I find problematic. I've read forums in which comments were made that sharing the negative aspects of orthodoxy might turn people off to becoming more religious. I believe that more damage is being done in the long run by withholding information.
     Back in 2009, orthodox guest poster Chabakuk Elisha posted his perspective on kiruv from the world of Chabad, on the blog "A Simple Jew" in an article entitled "Kiruv vs. Soul Mongering." He begins with a few excellent questions.

Let me start by asking if kiruv can be considered humane, ethical, moral, healthy or good? Is it even mentchlach [humane] to try to convince people to reject their families, backgrounds, friends, perhaps wives and children, and completely change their lives to join a community that in all likelihood they will always struggle to be a part of? Is that even fair? Is that really good for the individual prospective Baal Teshuva?3

While Chabakuk Elisha ultimately believes that Chabad does better outreach (as a whole entity) than other groups, he is honest in stating that there are problems. These problems often stem from the perception of those within kiruv. He states:

I think sometimes people forget that the potential mekurav [recruit] is a real person. He/she has a life, family, background, etc. They were raised a certain way and have certain responsibilities. They love and are loved. And all those things are important and need to be considered carefully – I can’t reconcile carelessly ripping people away from all of that and turning them into virtual orphans superimposed onto a society that’s often quite foreign, and sometimes remains foreign forever. How can we do that to people?4

     This goes back to previous posts on this blog where I've pointed out that even orthodox blogs, such as Beyond BT, have discussed at length that people who became orthodox from non-orthodox backgrounds often find that the world that they joined was very different from the world that they were sold. And while some of this may have had to do with the community that BTs ended up joining, solving the problems by moving to other possibly more open or welcoming communities is not always an answer. This goes back to the idea of deception. Why not be upfront about the problems before they become problems, so that people who truly want to become orthodox can successfully preempt them, and so that people who may have second thoughts can follow a different path before they get locked into a lifestyle that may not suit them? The writer continues:

 I find it to be very troubling for some guy with nothing to lose to tell anyone to turn their life upside down, in every way, and to heck with the consequences ....  But it seems to me that some of my frum brethren find this unacceptable .... they feel that [a] family [interested in, for example, observing some aspect of Shabbat--the Sabbath,] must suddenly go all the way or none of the way .... To some, kiruv is along the lines of other missionary groups that are seeking to save your soul – they aren’t interested in any single act or progression – they are looking to only to for complete and total transformation to their lifestyle. 5

     What's important to note in all of these cases is that criticism and discussion of kiruv's problems is not relegated to a small subset of disgruntled former baalei teshuva who've since left orthodoxy. When people make that assumption, it's just another excuse to sweep real problems under the proverbial carpet instead of looking critically at issues that affect all who are in some way touched by Jewish outreach.






1. "Marina." posted at August 26, 2013, 10:13AM in "Kiruv = Multi-Level Marketing," on August  Imamother. August 25, 2013.
2.HaSechel, Shilton. My Rant Against Kiruv Organizations. Shilton HaSechel. September 7, 2010.
3. Chabakuk Elisha. Kiruv vs. Soul Mongering. A Simple Jew. March 5, 2009.
4. ibid.
5. ibid.

How About the Easy Gift of Respect?

Click to enlarge. Project Inspire (affiliated with Aish HaTorah) is
selling outreach gifts for the "less-affiliated."

     Yes, you know the drill. Same problem as usual: the use of the phrase "less-affiliated." I have mentioned this in several other posts about Project Inspire's holiday outreach campaigns. Read them here, here, and here. (I discuss this in other posts as well, feel free to search this blog using the search feature.)
     While I find terms that appear to pass judgement on anyone's affiliation abhorrent, I was thinking about something else when I read this advertisement. This ad, like many of Project Inspire's other ads,  subconsciously serves to drive a wedge into Jewish culture as a whole, dividing us, in the words of Pink Floyd, into "us and them." This further serves to widen the gap between people who profess a desire to bring non-orthodox Jews to orthodoxy but then once they become orthodox, inevitably treat them and their children as second-class citizens.
     Furthermore, while it is very nice to give people gifts, such gift-giving can be perceived as awkward and even inappropriate in certain settings. Certain questions crop up when gifts from "acquaintances" are received: Why am I receiving this? Do I give a gift in return? Do I now owe this person something? What are the motives behind this gift? If this is a person at work, are there now concerns about job status, favoritism, and the disrupting the delicate social balance that needs to be maintained in the workplace?
     This isn't to say that there's anything wrong with a well-intentioned gift from the heart. And I'm thrilled to say that my own mom bakes honey cake and gives me one every year, but I know that there is genuine love in that gift, in addition to what has always been unconditional acceptance, even when she disagrees with choices I've made. I'm lucky to have a wonderful and diverse set of friends who are similar in that regard: we all accept each other, warts and all, without feeling the need to change each other. Such a gift from any of these people would never be second-guessed.
     I'm not sure if I've previously mentioned this, but a justification I've often heard for kiruv, not from Project Inspire, but from Chabad, was that the Jewish people should be considered like a body, and if one part of the body is hurting, the whole body works together to heal; we don't just cut people off. I think that we need to take this analogy of the Jewish people--and all people, really,--much further. Like a body, there are many different parts, and each part has its own unique qualities that make each part important. We cannot all be the spleen, nor can we all be the esophagus. We cannot all clone each other and be the left pinky toe. In order to be a whole and healthy society, we need to accept that we're not all exactly alike and weren't meant to be copies of each other, and honestly, not everyone is going to become (or wants to become) orthodox. Instead, we should respect each others' differences and see the good we all bring to our diverse communities, rather than focus on an imaginary scale of affiliation.

Increase in College Campus Outreach Planned

(Photo Credit: Bentzi Sasson for Chabad.edu)

  (This is hopefully a glitch-free version of the previously posted piece.)
     The last weekend of this past June 2013, "more than 800 men, women and children gathered . . .  at the Sheraton Hotel in Parsippany, N.J., for the Chabad on Campus International Shluchim Conference, an annual event for the families who run Chabad Houses on university and college campuses around the world." This event was set up in order to exchange ideas, knowledge, and provide support, structure, and programming for the Chabad Houses on college campuses. Currently, there are over 191 Chabad campus centers, and, according to Sara Esther Crispe's article, Chabad is preparing to increase their campus outreach by 20%, in order to mark the 20th anniversary of the death of the Lubavitcher Rebbe, Rabbi Menachem M. Schneerson. In a country with thousands of colleges, (see recent statistics here) one might be inclined to think that 191 campuses worldwide shouldn't concern anyone. But if you consider that there are other Jewish outreach groups making their homes on and around college campuses, it's something to think about. And to bring it all home, Rabbi Yossy Gordon, Executive Vice President of Chabad on Campus "shared some astounding statistics highlighting the impact that Chabad has on campuses throughout the world. He explained that any given week there are 12,000 students learning Torah, 9,000 attending Friday night Shabbat dinners, and 81,000 active relationships currently being nurtured."
    At this conference "participants were introduced to new initiatives and support in areas like Torah-study classes and event programming, in addition to marketing, branding and fundraising." Notice the use of the word "marketing." These are their words, not mine. While many in the orthodox world of kiruv may not want to admit that what they are doing is marketing Judaism, this article, written for a Chabad news organization by a well-known writer in the Chabad online community, implies that support in these areas (marketing, branding, and fundraising) are important in coordinating outreach efforts to college students on campuses. It is further stated that "immediately following the conference, Chabad on Campus International Foundation launched right into action holding two full day seminars dedicated to fundraising and marketing techniques with an expert in the field." While I understand that many regular readers of this blog will say "yes, we already know that marketing is taking place," I want to point out that when I use the word "marketing," it's not just me editorializing--it is readily admitted by some organizations, in this case, Chabad.
     Whether or not this article was meant for my eyes, or the eyes of people possibly on the receiving end of Jewish outreach, it is important to note that the friendly Chabad family on campus is not just a random orthodox family who is nice enough to welcome you to their table for challah, songs, and gefilte fish. They have an agenda and are trained specifically to engage, to teach, to raise funds, and to turn you on to a specific branch of Judaism. They attend yearly conferences and courses, and maintain an extensive network with each other in order to offer support when needed. Campus kiruv is not just an innocent dinner invitation. As my local traffic and weather station often repeats, "know before you go."    



All quotes taken from:
Crispe, Sara Esther. Chabad on Campus Poised for Expansion. Chabad.org. July 5, 2013.

Is Chabad Ultra-Orthodox?

photo credit: http://umsenglishdepartment.blogspot.com/

     I spend a lot of time on this blog referring to "ultra-orthodox" outreach. Usually, unless otherwise noted, I am referring to outreach groups including Chabad. I bring this up because while perusing Chabad.org, the colorful, article-laden, information-rich website put out for those curious about all things Chabad and Jewish related, I happened upon an article in which that same question was asked. Here is Chabad.org's answer:

Is Chabad "Ultra-Orthodox?"

Chabad is referred to as an "Orthodox" Jewish movement because it adheres to Jewish practice and observance within the guidelines of Talmudic law and its codifiers. The prefix “ultra” is commonly used by media broadcasters, but it has no practical meaning. It is used to marginalize a group or to portray them as extremists battling with extremists of other religions.
Mother Theresa was never called “ultra-Catholic.” Albert Schweitzer was never “ultra-Calvinist.” Doctors Without Borders are not ultra-militant New-Agers. When a Chabad couple travel to a community, they are not interested in converts, in battles, or in brainwashing youth. They are only interested in sharing their Shabbat tables and the heritage that belongs to every Jew. A Chabad House is a “Jewish Center” and a Chabad rabbi is a rabbi, period.
If you hear Chabad described in the media as “ultra-Orthodox,” pick up the phone or fire off an email and complain. Tell them Chabad is a Jewish movement, without any labels, and they should describe it as such.1

     As that is a statement put out by Chabad, I'm hesitant to argue, after all, they probably know better than anyone else how to define themselves. However, I really think that their statement is simply one of semantics. According to the website MyJewishLearning.com, "the word "haredi" is a catchall term, either an adjective or a noun, which covers a broad array of theologically, politically, and socially conservative Orthodox Jews, sometimes referred to as "ultra-Orthodox." What unites haredim is their absolute reverence for Torah, including both the Written and Oral Law, as the central and determining factor in all aspects of life.... Certain groups of haredim, notably, but not exclusively, members of Chabad Lubavitch, do make contact with non-haredi Jews for the purpose of kiruv--encouraging others to adopt more stringent religious observance."2
     Ami Steinberger, a Jewish Press blogger, explains that "“Ultra-Orthodox” is the English term that describes a large group of Jews, whose religious practice tends to be very strict and whose dress remains very conservative, reminiscent of Eastern Europe before modernity. Many English speakers are familiar with another term that describes this group – Haredim..... [The term Haredi is further explained as meaning] "those who tremble before the word of God."3
     I completely understand why Chabad, who tends to define themselves as a movement and a philosophy, eschews the use of the term "ultra-orthodox." They don't want to appear threatening. Under the heading "Questions People Ask" in the handbook for outreach workers,  it's written that they find labels to be problematic because they divide people. To Chabadniks, one is simply a Jew. However welcoming and pluralistic this sounds, the late Lubavitcher Rebbe, Menachem Schneerson, is cited as having stated that "the doctrines and ideologies of the Reform and Conservative movements, can only be classed in the category of heretical movements which have plagued our people at one time or another, only to disappear eventually, having no basis in our everlasting Torah, the Torah of truth, the living Torah, Toras Emes, Toras Chaim."4 
     Rather than divide people by labels, it is better to get rid of the labels that the Chabad movement finds problematic. To them, all non-orthodox Jews appear to be equal as (non-orthodox) Jews. However, to Lubavitchers, Chabad is Chabad, and even though they may fall under the Hebrew term haredi, they never want to be called by the English translation "ultra-orthodox."

1. What is Chabad? Frequently Asked Questions. Chabad.org. http://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/776104/jewish/FAQ.htm

2. Weiss, Raysh. Haredim (Charedim.) MyJewishLearning.com http://www.myjewishlearning.com/history/Jewish_World_Today/Denominations/Orthodox/haredim.shtml
3. Steinberger, Ami. Ktzat Ivrit. The Jewish Press. com Blogs. January 30, 2013. http://www.jewishpress.com/blogs/ktzat-ivrit/in-hebrew-the-meaning-of-haredi/2013/01/30/
4. On Reform and Conservative Judaism. TrueJews.org. http://truejews.org/Igud_Historic_Declaration.htm

Have A Sexy Passover?

Using sex to sell Judaism?

     With the understanding that much of Jewish outreach uses marketing techniques to get non-orthodox Jews involved in Orthodox Judaism, I have to say that I was still rather surprised to see that Jeff Seidel's ad for Passover Hospitality had a picture of Israeli supermodel Bar Rafaeli, hands clasped as if bound, staring sexily at the camera. This is the part where you, the reader, should glance at the ad and say "Hey, isn't Jeff Seidel the guy that everyone meets in Jerusalem? The guy who sets up hundreds of kids for Shabbos with ultra-orthodox families?" And then, you, the reader, take another look at the ad and say "What does this picture have to do with Passover?"
     That's exactly it. As a woman, I'm tired of companies exploiting women's bodies to sell products. But in this case, I have to wonder why Jeff Seidel needs to resort to using sex to sell an orthodox Jewish experience, when this is the antithesis of what Orthodoxy is teaching. This is a new low for kiruv organizations. Jeff Seidel's Jewish Student Information Centers have been around for decades during which Jeff has been setting high school and college-age people up with families who adhere to the stringencies of orthodoxy, such as  taharas hamishpacha (family purity laws which demand that married couples refrain from sex at certain times,) and strict rules of gender separation and tzniut (modesty) among others. Not only is Bar Rafaeli's sexuality being used to turn young men on to observance, but blatant sexuality is strongly discouraged in the world into which these young people are entering.
     In the spirit of Passover, I have four questions, each which should be asked with a glass of wine:
1.What makes this Passover outreach campaign different from any other Passover outreach campaign?
2. Is Bar Rafaeli aware that her picture is out there, selling orthodox Judaism?
3. Does Jeff Seidel know that Bar Rafaeli dates guys who are not necessarily Jewish?
4. Are Jewish outreach organizations so desperate to attract possible adherents, that they're willing to embark on advertising campaigns that paint them as blatant hypocrites?

*Thanks to Failed Messiah for linking back to this page.

Birthright Israel: Focus on Mayanot

     Chances are that if you're a Jewish college student, or if you're the parent of a Jewish college student, or even if you've been a college student yourself in the past thirteen years, you've heard of Taglit Birthright, a program run by a not-for-profit organization that sponsors free ten-day trips to Israel for the post-high school (18-26 years old) set. Read more at their official site or on wikipedia. Under the Birthright umbrella, students have the opportunity to choose the trip of their choice, each run by different trip providers. This is where it gets tricky. There are about fifteen trip providers, ranging from orthodox to non-denominational. Birthright offers some tips on how to choose your trip provider, however, despite the denominations listed near the trip description, it's still easy to get them confused. Here's why: the trips listed as orthodox in denomination don't appear to be geared towards orthodox college students. They welcome all types of Jews and from what I understand, the programs are generally well-run, informative, and a lot of fun. There may be subtle differences in each orthodox group's particular ideology (some trips are run by Chabad, others by OU, others by Ezra, etc.) but there seems to be a general understanding that most students going on these trips are probably not orthodox and so the trips are run more liberally than one might expect.  Orthodox trip providers have put a lot of effort into not making their program descriptions appear to be orthodox in any way. However, it is not the initial Birthright trip that poses a potential outreach/kiruv issue, but the follow-up after the trip and possible pressure to attend yeshiva programs affiliated with the group's particular brand of orthodoxy that could be problematic. Understanding that this post could be endless, let's focus on one program for now. I've chosen to focus on Mayanot because it is the first orthodox organization listed on Birthright's list.1

     Mayanot, the Birthright program run by Chabad, mentions partying, learning about contemporary issues, exciting tourist attractions, partying, the political, cultural, and "spiritual" dimensions of Israel, and of course, the word that excites even the tamest of college students, partying. And have I mentioned partying? The description is very careful to only mention the word "orthodox" under the heading "affiliation," and states further down that "Mayanot draws inspiration from Chabad spirituality." Nowhere on this site does it say that the Mayanot is actually an outreach/kiruv yeshiva, but if you do a little independent research, you'll find that Mayanot is actually a baal teshuva yeshiva, designed to help Jews become orthodox. Mayanot is run by Chabad and while their Birthright trip isn't making people orthodox, the trip does serve as another feeder for their yeshiva and study programs. This is the link to the Wikipedia site, but you can find this information on their site as well. In the blurb about the sponsoring organization, Mayanot Institute of Jewish Studies, (not quite a name that someone would associate with an orthodox yeshiva,) words such as "academic," "intellectual," and "textual study,"are used--words that sound more like they were taken from a college course catalog than anything linked to an ultra-orthodox yeshiva. This is not to say that any participants on the Birthright trip are ever forced to become religious, however, be aware that ideas on religious issues may be from a Chabad perspective even if it's more like Chabad-lite, (what I'll call outreach that is specifically meant to get non-orthodox Jews interested,) and students may be urged to extend their stay in Israel for an additional three weeks to study on their Post-Birthright Study Program.

     The Mayanot Post-Birthright Study Program draws students in with the excitement of being away from home for a longer period, but also with the insanely cheap price. "Taglit-Birthright Israel participants can apply for a scholarship to join this program for only $99! This includes tuition, room and board for 3 full weeks (normal tuition for this program is $799)" their website screams. (They also offer longer and shorter programs.) Having traveled extensively while in college and on a tight budget, I can tell you that this would have drawn me in. Three additional weeks, all-inclusive? Sounds like a good deal! One of the ways they get to students to commit to the post-trip study program is by presenting potential participants with a sense of urgency, mentioning on their website that  "although applications for this scholarship will be available on your Taglit-Birthright Israel trip in Israel, due to the popularity of the program only those applications that are received in advance of your trip may be guaranteed a spot." How many young travelers, excited and possibly apprehensive about traveling alone in Israel, are thinking "well, I should definitely do this! What's a few hours of study a day when I can still travel and hang out?" But before you sign up for this or any program, stop and ask the trip providers for details.
     Here are a few questions you should ask if you're wondering if the Post-Birthright trip deal is too good to be true. The Mayanot trip may seem like a party and you may have an awesome time. But you should ask these things before you sign up for additional weeks through their yeshiva:   

1. If I do the post-Birthright study program (which is not co-ed,) how long will I be expected to be in the classroom, studying? Will I have free time? Request a typical daily schedule, preferably in writing, with the times outlined so you can understand how your day will look.
2. Will I be expected to adhere to orthodox religious practice even if I don't want to? 
3.  If I decide the program is not for me, am I free to leave? 
4.  What are my financial obligations if I decide to leave the program?
5. Why am I being offered what has been billed as a $799 program for only $99? What are this group's ulterior motives?  

When asked about his experiences with the Mayanot Birthright trip, former participant Eli stated:

They made in obvious attempt to convince us to stay longer by repeating how easy it was to extend your flight. They also brought us to the Mayanot yeshiva before Shabbos where we had to sit through a parsha (Torah portion of the week) class. Most of the participants were secular and were only concerned with going out and partying. Mayanot encouraged that as well, even putting it on the itinerary as a frabrengen (joyous, usually Hasidic, gathering.)

There was an emphasis on Kabalah (Jewish mysticism) and we spent a bit too much time in Tzfat (famous for Jewish mysticism and Kabalah.) We had to hear a Kabalist artist who was a baal teshuvah (returnee to orthodox Judaism) speak about what inspired him and almost everyone felt they had to buy something from him.
Shabbos wasn't as strict as an NCSY2 Shabbaton, but we weren't allowed to swim or leave the hotel (there was actually a warning if one left the hotel they would be sent home immediately and have to pay their return flight.) I guess they were concerned for safety to an extent, but when it wasn't Shabbos they let us roam all around Jerusalem and Tel Aviv at night, so it didn't really make sense to me.
While I definitely felt a presence of kiruv, I noticed more of an effort to convince people to make aliyah (move to Israel.)

As for the Mayanot Birthright trip, be aware that you may be approached to extend your trip to attend Mayanot's yeshiva programs. There are other trip extensions that are not centered on religion. Or students can do what a lot of us did, and just bring a backpack and sleeping bag, and find a youth hostel near places of personal interest. No matter which provider you choose, be sure to research the trip providers and any information the website may contain about post-trip programs.
 


1. Other posts will discuss other Birthright options listed on their site as "orthodox."
2. NCSY is an orthodox youth group sponsored by the OU (the Orthodox Union) who also do outreach/kiruv work.

The following articles might be of interest to readers interested in Birthright

Birthright's Israel: The Political Bias of the Jewish Community's Favorite Program by Nathan Ehrlich. November 28, 2011

Largest Outreach Effort for Alums of Birthright Raises Concerns by Gal Beckerman. August 26, 2009

Birthright Alumni Center Tied to Haredi Outreach Group, by Gal Beckerman. September 2, 2009