Outrage Ensues After Aish HaTorah Posts Controversial Facebook Meme

 On Friday, June 24, 2016, the ultra-orthodox Aish HaTorah kiruv group's Facebook page posted a meme stating that "Silence equals consent" along with a picture of a young woman covering her face. Facebook users immediately exercised more than silence, berating the international outreach group for lacking sensitivity and common sense in posting a picture and quote with no context that evokes thoughts of rape, sexual abuse, sexual harassment, and unwanted sexual contact.
  Readers of the Facebook page expressed their immense displeasure with Aish's post, rebuking them for a lack of sensitivity. Those knowledgeable in Talmud tried explaining the original post. Commenter Yardena Winegust wrote "One translation says "silence is regarded as admission" and then added "Shame on you. The choice of image, and choice of quote is exceptionally triggering to those who have experienced sexual assault." Others tried to be understanding of this horrific blunder. Shana Aaronson stated "Please remove this immediately. I assume (hope) that this was not your intention but this quote translated like this, especially together with this picture, is irresponsible, insensitive, triggering, and outrageously inappropriate." Commenter Meranda Prediger wrote:

This was very poorly thought out. In fact, I dare suggest it was not thought out at all. The quote relates to moral conduct and the need to stand up for what is right as saying nothing is the same as supporting. This image, combined with the quote and no further explanation inserts the wrong context. It is a very dangerous image as is right now.

(More comments can be read in the pictures on this post. Click to enlarge each section.)
  This PR disaster is more than just a little mistake on social media. It's indicative of a clear lack of understanding of the world outside of Aish's religious bubble. In a time when images on social media spread like wildfire, Aish has shown that they are not at all in step with the world outside of their community--even though it is the people of that world who they are trying to recruit. Scarier still is that Aish HaTorah serves as an umbrella for groups like MEOR Maimonides Leaders Fellowship which exist on college campuses throughout the United States. A mistake of this magnitude doesn't just reach a couple of people on Facebook. It travels back to college students and their parents--who are possible donors to Aish's many programs. It travels to people who will now be wary of Aish's mission, and it travels to people like myself--who are critical of ultra-orthodox kiruv.
  While many users called for the outreach group to remove the picture immediately, the picture remained posted (and, at the time of this post, is still online), most likely due to the onset of Shabbat in Israel, where it assumed the post was made.
  Update: Thank you to Hemant Mehta, at the Friendly Atheist, for writing about this and quoting this blog. At the time of this update, Aish.com's post has been shared 160 times and remains posted.
  Update 2: At the time of this update, Aish.com's Facebook page had been updated with an apology reading:

Aish.com apologizes for the graphic that was posted before Shabbat. The meaning of the Talmudic quote was meant to inspire people NOT to remain silent in the face of evil. Given the photo and lack of context, we regret posting something that contained an alternative offensive meaning. It was not our intention; we goofed.

While I'm not a fan of Aish HaTorah, I'm relieved to see that they had the sense to issue an apology after posting something that was so hurtful to so many. A screen shot has been included at the end of this post. Click the graphic to enlarge.
  

Orthodox Kiruv, Rape Culture, and an Unrelated Interview with the Blogger

     I'd like to extend a warm thank you to all of the readers who have messaged me with their stories, their questions, and their comments about this blog. Over the past months, I've been ridiculously busy with many other projects. I was also touched to receive a request for an interview for the OTD Stories project, started by a good friend of mine. In this interview, I discuss my journeys both on and off the derech (path of orthodox Judaism,) as well as a bit about my current projects. I figured I'd share that here, in case you're interested. While you're there, take a look around. It's a really great site, and totally worth your time.

     I'd also like you point you over to this article, The Grey Area of Rape Culture in the Black and White World of Jewish Orthodoxy by Esther Tova Stanley, in which Ms. Stanley discusses how young women targeted by kiruv professionals are often put in very compromising positions in a relationship with rabbis who are seen as trusted authority figures. She states:

You see, there’s an odd relationship between male authority figures (“Rabbis”) and female students that is considered “normal” within the post high-school year abroad programs. It not only accepts, but actively encourages a relationship in which an adult male takes young female students under his wing in the name of “kiruv” (loosely translated to bringing someone closer to G-d.) [sic]

The Rabbis do this by cultivating a false sense of trust, telling the young students that they see something special in them, encouraging them to share details of their personal lives and sometimes offering (inappropriate) personal details of their own. As my seminary Rabbi once said to me in reference to “his girls” and his method of kiruv, “I like to break them and then make them.”  This creepy comment was followed by an even creepier wink. (Lucky for me, I left that school almost as fast as I got there.)

The idea is for this relationship to inspire the student, spiritually.  To see that living an ultra-orthodox life is the only REAL way to truly LIVE. Those Rabbis who engage in it are seen as possessing a gift, are considered selfless for giving up so much of their time to educate and uplift young, easily influenced souls and bring them onto the path of observance. It’s considered a mitzvah (a good deed.)1

     Most campus kiruv organizations push students to go on extended trips to Israel, many of which include time spent learning in yeshivas or seminaries, depending on one's gender. In addition to being away from home and healthy doses of skepticism, students are encouraged to spend time with rabbis, who often take on the role of spiritual advisers. This puts students in a position of heightened vulnerability, a position they may not even realize they're in at the time.
     I strongly suggest reading the article in full for a good understanding of how there really can be a grey area between trusted rabbi and sexual predator, and how the boundaries of appropriateness can easily be both obscured and crossed in the male-rabbi female-student relationship.


1. Stanley, Esther Tova. The Grey Area of Rape Culture in the Black and White World of Jewish Orthodoxy. qtd. on Not for Ourselves Alone: Gender Politics and Parenting in the 21st Century blog by Juliet C. Bond. April 20, 2015. 6:58am.